chErrY ; chErIsh

2011-03-05T22:15:00.002+08:00

收藏在眼眸常徘徊左右
爱猜到没有
愉快玩笑后能全然退后
你开心就够

这种感觉太亲厚
讲一千句也不够
假使讲了你听到后
或会走
这种恋爱太罕有
不须真正拥有
成全衷心祝福然后
就放手

放手放开所有
彼此更自由
放手
其实我绝非爱得不疚
放手豁出所有
还有这个好友
已经已经足够

2011-02-23T22:29:00.002+08:00

"24 June 2008"

This was what i posted on my blog..

"Perhaps it's time to face the reality and not hoping that there is hope.
i guess i'm alr halfway there my decision.
Yes, i shld tell myself to let go.
"If i don't let go of the past, the future will never come."
Now, only time will let it heals by itself."

"8 August 2008"

"Okay, the decision I’ve made.
I won’t be giving you another chance.
Another chance to let you hurt me again.
We had a hard time before we can get together.
But you are treating me this way.
Such a shame on you, don’t you think so?
Don’t promise something that you can’t give.
Anyway, it’s over between us.
Though, now my journey seems to be hard to walk.
Never mind, I guess time is the best medicine for me right now.
Time and friend’s accompany is all I need now.
You can make me in love with you,
You can make me hate you, at the same time."

"3 Dec 2008"

" breaking up doesnt mean one cannot love again. I'm just a baby which is learning how to walk, despite falling down several times, the baby can't give up and not learn how to walk because if she can't walk, t's pointless, she shall learn how to walk again.
Failing once doesnt means that you are gonna fail the next time, it is the key to success. I've learnt how to let go and now it's time to let go.. though it hurts to say that, but i still have to let go because 1 thing i know is that someone is happy. My love for you wont fade no matter what happens.
I can't cry, i've to be strong. "
When i was reading.. i was totally surprised. surprised because it's a 12 years old girl.
gosh. there's alot to learnt from. and my path down is still very long and tough to go..

sometimes, i find myself being so weak.
Yet it seemed so helpless.
So near yet so far.
That's my feeling. "

"12 July 2009"

"Asking me to let it go, looking for another one that suits what i want..
It hurts alot.
Letting go was never easy for anyone.
"Don't put too much heart in it" This was what you told me.. You think i can control my feelings? oh well,
I never blame you for being like this.. i take it, i accept it..
I would never regret the path that i've taken..
Cos once i've put my heart and soul in it..,i will never give up so easily..
I'll still continue walking.."

Was reading my past few posts in the last few years..

really missed those wonderful days in school.. especially QTSS and during ITE...

oh well...

time flies.

Jayden is 15 months old.

He's learning to talk/speak. walking ard..

When i realized i'm expecting him, mind was totally blank..

1st thing that came to my mind was.. to keep or not to..

when i've made the decision, didn't expect my family members will be so supportive.

yeah, i love them to the max! everyone seriously.

thinking that, you will love me more when i have made this path.

It was a foolish thought. silly me.

even when i'm expecting,we are even quarreling.

i don't know when things wil get better..

i'm tired...

i came across this "If i don't let go of the past, the future will never come."

Now, only time will let it heals by itself."

If at that point of time, i'm stronger... things wont be the same...

Oh well,

i'm just whining...

will be fine after a sleep..

another 4 more months,

2 babies will be joining our big family.. hehe. so looking forward to that day.

i miss everyone of them.

i miss the old house.

mummy was looking at the photo in the morning...

she say "everyone looks different now"

i know how she felt too...

bcos everyone was at m'sia at that period of time..

only the 4 of us were not there to send him off..

i miss you.

Brother is going to NS soon..

going to miss him hell loads..

guess mummy wil be having a hard time ... :S

better not make her during that period of time...

haha.

2011-02-12T15:09:00.003+08:00

True Love

True love is hard to find. You don't have to look far to realize it.

So, what is love?

In simple terms, Love,

-is the affectionate attachment of a man to a woman and vice versa.

-is the unselfish affectionate attachment of a man to a woman and vice versa.

The difference between the love majority of people profess and true love is...

SELFLESSNESS.

Love that is true is....

1.considerate

2.Affectionate

3.Empathetic

4.Selfless

5.Self sacrificing

6.Loyal

7.Faithful

8.Committed

9.Collaborative

10.Enduring

and..

Forgiving.

If you are in love with someone and you discover that he/she is selfish and opinionated, then he's not truly in love with you.

"Genuine love is true. True love is enduring."

The Bible captures the essence of true love when it says:

"Love is not jealous, it does not brag, does not get puffed up, does not behave indecently, does not look for its own interests, does not become provoked.

It does not keep account of the injury. It does not rejoice over unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth.

It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails"

"If you find this kind of love - true love - it will last forever because true love never fails."

So, re-assess your love relationship again. If the characteristics of genuine love listed above is missing, give a second thought to the love relationship.

Should you really continue with a love relationship that is doomed for failure even before it starts?

Obviously, the answer is no.

The truth is . . . your love relationship will eventually fail if it is not based on solid foundation of love, genuine love.

The result?

Heartbreak.

May that never happen to you. And it won't if you make the right choice from the very beginning.

爱情是一句承诺一生执着,纵然过去缘份亏欠太多.

在心中一把不灭爱的火,
依然那么热烈那么缠绵燃烧着.

等待什么盼望什么,
一起追求什么分享什么.

生命里放弃怎么做,
才能拥有自由拥有幸福和快乐.

I am back to blogging!

2010-12-16T20:43:00.005+08:00

How time flies!

Xmas is coming soon, 9 more days. In the past, i will always looking forward to this day, getting presents from your loves ones... As we grew older, you are being left behind. oh well.. I'm getting used to it now..

2010，对我来说是个很大的变化。

Has stepped into a motherhood, learning to be a good mother, good wife, good daughter-in-law is never easy.. never easy handling quarrels,arguments with him.. tired with all the argues we have.

whatever it is! oh well, always look on the bright side of life.. remember the rainbow's story? haha.

I missed those days working at gwc with my clique.

singing, dancing with the loud music on even though customers is complaning our music is loud..

miss cooking the pearls, the teas, cooking and the process of making the ice cream... miss those wonderful days hell loads..

2009，是我最难过的一年。

我失去了最疼爱我，我的爷爷。

everyone knows my big day was on the 19 sep 2009.

He left us on the 9 sep,2009.

10 more days..

I couldnt even see him for the last time...

wasnt there for his wake, that was the hardest thing for me to accept.

It's been a year,i still miss him so much......

Your birthday is coming, 28dec... i am going to drag my legs down to pay you a visit.. only scare that i'll be crying the whole day over there...

okay,shall stop emo-ing.

was grateful to some of my frens who were there when i need your shoulders, giving me a big hug and say " no worries, cried it all out and you will be fine"

okay,

here a song that i always listen everyday...

要说得多动听
才能证明最亲密的关系
云绕着天空什么也没讲
已是最美好的约定

要说得多华丽
才能说出最默契的默契
我在你身边呼吸都沉默
你却懂我每个情绪
这世界太热闹怎么倾听
一颗心呼唤另一颗的声音
这世界再热闹还好我们
刚好在这里刚好很安静

love you~love you~

要说得多肯定
才能肯定两个人的心情
风遇上风筝还没有邀请
已经一起愉快旅行

要说得多用力
才能留下最坚定的确定
每一个路口你不用开口
我已经重合你脚印

这世界太热闹怎么倾听
一颗心呼唤另一颗的声音
这世界再热闹还好我们
刚好在这里刚好很安静(刚好很安静)
所有感受不用形容
已经那么懂(已经那么懂)
所有的感动是安静的心动(安静的心动)
这世界再热闹也没关系
每一个眼神我们就能感应
这世界再热闹我们已经
在彼此心里所以很安静(所以很安静)

ps: missed those nights standing at the beach shouting our hearts out!

21st Bdae!

2010-10-30T19:42:00.009+08:00

the gangs.

Emily, Helmi and me.

Emily and me.

MOnica
Else
Got to know them when i was working at gwc. missed those wonderful times. (:

Alex and me.
Alex busy eating chicken wings. hmm.
Aunt Deborah. Hehe

my loveable cake! sweet.
All my cousin!

Jenn and Cia
Mag and Sis,Belinda
Alex, Derek Helmi,Jordan and emily. Weiling and candy missing from the picture..

Nov babies.

Cousin Dillion.
Just love him more!
My precious Jayden!
the latest gang!

my god-brother since i was in sec 3!!

Desmond tang!! no change. always trying to shoot me with his words. =.=

Salleh.
Like finally, they met after we graduated from sec sch.

2010-09-13T21:08:00.003+08:00

I'm planning to buy a camera.. but i got no idea which want i should buy..

Can anyone give me some views? (:

DSC-W380

DSC - TX1/N

So Choice 1 or Choice 2?

Got no idea sia.. hahas.

Anyway, been busy with work for the past few weeks! ):

Lucky, the load is getting lesser now..

Got a box of moon-cake from the company(:(: Expensive brand,okay? It's cost about 40 plus outside. I think the company is rich.

Candy have 1 red packet from the company too, 50 bucks okay..

rich company? 0.o

How time flies! this coming sunday is our 1st Year ANNIVERSARY!! hees.

But happy also no use, his plan was to celebrate his mother's birthday when i actually told him to put it on sat alr. Still, he insisted to put on sunday... OH WELL!

placed so much hope also no point, the higher you will get yourself hurt.

I rather placed all my hopes all on my darling jayden!

Alright, got to go! update soon again! (:

Baby First Words!

2010-09-01T21:32:00.002+08:00

First, i would like to say thank you to my dear friends who showed their care by asking how is my first day of working is..

I'm so sorry that i didn't reply your messages, you know who you are. Really sorry!! Was so busy that i had no time for it! argh! First week of work, i had been staying at the office over time which mean OT! My official time was 9am to 6pm.

Probably because first week, i wasn't too familiar with the work i'm handling so that was why i was abit slow. But now, i'm getting used to it and coping it very well. Just that workload is damn too much! ): Couldn't even sit down and slowly enjoy my cup of tea. You'll see me bitting on a food and drinking while my eyes is on the comp. hahas!

My daily work would be dealing with the booking numbers, printing SAST, looking for vessel code and then vessel voyage. Thereafter, i'm looking at loads of sets of paper, with 10 pages full=1 set. Sometimes the system maybe very lag too, due to loads of people using and it could be the containers contains too much! hahas. Oh well! This is working life!

Alright, my spectacles will be done tml! Yes! I'm wearing it at the age of 21. tsk!

Bcos i don't want to strain my vision so i decided to make 1. If not, my vision will be blur and making my eyes so strain!! hahas!

How is Jayden coping?

He's turning 9 months in few days time!

Hahas! double digits soon, then going to hit the 1 soon!hahas! so looking forward la!

He's leaning to crawl towards us now, making alot of sound, probably learning to talk now.

His 1st word was mumum * whenever he see his milk, he will "pui" his "tutu" then say mumum with the mouth expression! *so cute*

Today 1-09-10 he say baba, which sounds like papa, omg! i was like -.-

Why is it not mama first then papa? mummy is always the one looking after him,patiently! not like daddy, has no patient at times though..

Mummy is going to Bkk again! Going to make a long list of things for her to buy back for me.

hahas! i need more CLOTHES AND SHOES!

If not, i'm always having headache what to wear for work. arghh.

Alright, got to stop here. Heading to bed soon!

Will update more with pictures soon!

Have a nice weekends!(:

2010-08-26T21:36:00.005+08:00

Sunflowers!!

I need this to brighten up my day so as to make my tired-ness go away! hahas!

Work is never ending for me!! ): i guess not only me but everyone.. ):

My table! and for your info.. do u see a lil head in front there? it's candy's head. hahas.

Am so shag now.. arghh! always heading home like a hungry ghost!

MADNESS! I went out at about 815am without having breakfast, then lunch at 1pm. then always worked till 6 and then OT cos work seem to be never ending. hahas. then depends on i wanna stay till what time, then rush back home and settle down for dinner first!!

1st Day of work:

Have been working very slow because i'm still not that familiar with the operations and thus leaving home at 7pm.

Oh well, i'm earning extra money! (:

2nd Day:

Better idea to get the vessel code and then the vessel voyage..

oh well, my job for now, looking at the container numbers and Shipment number telly's with what i have inside the comp.

i guess the words were kill me sooner or later!

OR I SHOULD SAY, I'M GOING WEAR A SPEC SOON!!

Looked at the list of papers.. 2 sets of 10+ pages of paper to look at. And i have to go through one by one.. ):

i think my eyesight is killing me by looking at this everyday.

Going down to have my eyes check soon!

Haven done finish yet!! gosh!

Am tired now! going to my beauty world soon!!

Now i'm always looking forward to friday, like my friends does! hahas!!

TML IS FRIDAY!!

okay,shall update soon!

8 Months 1 Week 3 Days Old

2010-08-18T16:26:00.003+08:00

Baby Jayden is growing up so fast that i couldn't catch up with him!!

So fast that i couldn't imagined it, madness!

In few weeks time, he will be 9 months old. Going to hit the 1 soon!! (",)

On a happy note, by November he will be celebrating birthday with me!! so happy lar!! Pray hards, he will called me by then!! hee.

Pictures that were taken at my nia jia..

Inside his "yao lan", he would always showed his leg so high up. (:

I am going to work soon!

Left with exactly a week to eat,sleep at home.

But the best thing is to work with candy at the same department.

having your best friend to go work together in the morning, have lunch together and end work and go back home together. how good it is!! (:

Got to stop here. Jayden is sitting on my lap now!

see ya!!

Black Friday

2010-08-13T19:40:00.002+08:00

I had a bad National Day!

I spend the night at A&E SGH, the atmosphere was very tense. even worst than delivery suite.

What had happened to me?

Well, i slipped and fell forwards and there goes my front teeth. ):

I was sitting down outside the living room, when i heard jayden's crying, i quickly run to attend him and i fell.

I was so upset that i blame myself for doing so. tsk!

1 of my front tooth was chipped, i was so sad!! I spent so much money on braces few years back and there goes my tooth. sigh. i went to A&E alone, hubby met me over there. When i reached there, the atmosphere is damn tense. It makes me shiver!! i'm like wearing a long jeans, a shirt and a jacket yet i'm still shivering.

My parents came down when i told them that they don't have to make a trip down.

When my parents came, my eyes turned red and watery. I don't know why also.

If only i didn't went back to hubby's place that night, such thing won't happen.

Arghh. No point blaming on whatever reason.

Happened has already took place, perhaps it happen for a reason.

Wednesday, went back to orchard where i had my braces over there.

Seen the doctor, had a X-ray.

Doc: When the tooth is being traumatised, the nerves were def dead.

me: o.o had already knew the answer when i was at A&E.

Doc: If your tooth turn grey or black, quickly come back and let me see okay?

me: ok..

if *touch wood* everything does not go well, i have to do root canal surgery.

Haven't even started work and i got to pay so much expenses le. dental itself alr cost me a bomb. lucky, my parents are helping me with it. most slightly, i have to put braces again cos my 2 front tooth has turned out of shape le. ):

Now, having a bad headache, a bad flu.

What's more worst can it be for me?

2010-07-29T12:48:00.004+08:00

Exactly 2 more days to August!

Left with 4 more months to a brand new year!! Time is like passing like a train? Even faster than i could imagine..

A brand new year, a brand new start. With new goals, new targets and i'll be busy planning for Jayden's everything. Be it his education, upbringing, diet meal everyday and etc. With that itself, it's going to make me go mad. ): Especially upbringing is very important.

If i don't bring him up well, in future i'll suffer.

Okay, shall not say this anymore.

I'm heading to Genting soon!!

Which makes me,looking forward to next Wednesday!! Shall hope when i'm there, time will not pass so fast.. Let me slowly enjoy myself and at the same time, taking a real good break cum relaxation over there.

Going to get myself a good massage, good manicure, movie Marathon with hubby (hoping that there are shows that i'm interested with), shopping and playing and etc..

Didnt really get to enjoy myself the last time when i went there.. ): Partly because most of the games were under renovation..

Shall update again soon with pictures!! (:

HAPPY SWEET 21ST BIRTHDAY FELICIA!!

2010-07-25T14:56:00.006+08:00

HAPPY SWEET 21ST BIRTHDAY FELICIA!!

Went to meet CherYl at IMM first to get Cia's present first before heading to her birthday party at bukit batok west, CSC.

Walked around, didn't get to see any of our likes so we brought her a Hello Kitty Pillow. (:

When we reached there, it was still early. Birthday gal was busy dressing up. So me and Cher took some pictures first.. (:

It's been so long since we took pictures lar.. Arghh. Should find those old pictures and compare.. See how much have we changed.. hahas. I love this picture ttm!! THE BALLOON!!

THE BIRTHDAY CARD!! (",)

THE STAGE!

I was telling Cher that somehow i love the atmosphere here. Partly because the place is near MRT Stations. I don't have to travel all the way down to the east with all my things... I'm still considering where to hold my birthday party.. hahas.. so make yourself free guys and gals.. hahas!

Taken in the toilet. -.- After so many years, I'm still.. still.. the shortest.. ): In future, i want to wear heels when i'm out with them..

Awesome 3!

Actually there's 4 of us. Oh well, the other one has not been contacting us since we graduate from primary school. So all the while, 3 of us has been keeping in touch till now.

I'm so glad that our friendship is still going strong even up till now. Primary 3 till now.. It's like12 years plus.. And still counting.. hehe.

Kim Hong, Christina, me and CherYl,

And.. With the Bdae Gal. She damn SKINNY LAR!!

CherYl, Bdae Girl, Me, Yena.

Sweetest Yena. Ever since P1? o.o

THE BIRTHDAY CAKE.

SEE, BIRTHDAY GAL'S MUM IS SO HIGH.. DANCING!!

3 BABES that fits the theme. FUNK AND ROCK.

Alot of prizes was given that day. Lol. I think Felicia spend alot on this..

Few questions was given, and we were supposed to run out to the chair and answer.

I was so shy that i didn't run out, but Felicia pull me out..

Q: WHAT WAS FELICIA MOST DISLIKE COLOR?

Then she already pull me out to the chair, i was like what was the answer ah?? Mind cannot function at that point of time..

Only when they gave the answer then it struck my mind that she told me before that she love hello kitty but she doesn't like PINK!!

THE ZHANGDE-RENS!!

Jeslin Boyfriend, Jeslin, Fei Zhen, Yena, Jing Wen, Felicia (birthday girl), Cheryl.

Supposed to be a fun shot but OH well!!

Pretty pretty!!

The cake was average.. can be better if the strawberry was not so sour...

Hubby have not get the tickets to genting yet. ): He is going to get it later in the evening..

Hopefully, i hope there's still tickets left for us.. Then i can start preparing lo.. I wanted a short break for so long.. ):

Mummy is going to thailand this weekend.. ):

What's up next?

Candy's Birthday and Magdeline Birthday!! o.o

Shall stop here.. Going to prepared myself to go grandma house now..

Cheers!

2010-07-21T21:12:00.003+08:00

Was supposed to buy tickets to genting yesterday. But because we stayed at uncle's house and came back home late. that was why we didnt went out to buy.. Going to get it on friday! (:

Went over to Sembawang on Tuesday with hubby to visit baby lucas (:

He is such a cutie pie!!

It was raining heavily, so we didnt leave the place as early as we planned.

Alright, enjoy the pictures!

Lucas on the walker. (: He followed us all the way to the kitchen to the room.. hahas.

Looked at his smile. (",)

Cousin Teri and Cousin Lucas

Cousins!

10th Month Anni! (:

2010-07-19T10:15:00.005+08:00

Today is our 10months anniversary!

That's how time flies!!

10months back, we'll still busy preparing our wedding etc.

I knew him since my first year of ITE. Which was 4 years back? (:

Been through many things.. arghh. I actually can't believe that i'm with a guy who used to hurt me so deeply and eventually made me fall so deeply in love with him.

Perhaps this is all fated to be?

Hees. I received a present from hubby(: He made a credit card for me.. hees. But i guess i wont be using it anyway.

Hehe. They send the card at a good timing!

Tml will be heading down to buy the tickets.. Decided to go genting next month on the 3rd. (:

Hopes everything will go well, i hope our plan won't last min cancel. So please!! ('',)

Okay, below are the pictures taken on Sunday.

Flea Market! Business was average lar.. Can be better if not for the rain..

I earned $190 for just 6hours.

All the 2nd hand shirt.

Hubby was just sitting there taking plastic bag for me to put shirt for them. He seem to be so bored sitting there.. lol.

His shirt, i asked him how much does he want to sell. He told me up to me to decide. -.-

His clothing went out very fast, partly bcos his shirt are those sport branded like Puma, Nike, Adidas.

I hate those Ban-gala who bargain the price with me. Already selling at a cheap price still asking for $1/2. -.- Jeans selling at least for $5/6.

Alright, that's all for now, i guess..

Will update again soon with pictures.. (:

Baby 1ST Fever! ):

2010-07-16T22:15:00.003+08:00

Finally, I've made the layout of the skin i wanted to..

Must thank my twin sister, Wei ling for teaching and helping me.. (:

Managed to know how to play with it, rather than waiting for friends to help me.. hahas.

It's fun though!

Having a nose block since last night. Not sure if i caught the flu bug from baby jayden.

He had fever last night, 38.11 ): Felt so heart aching seeing him suffering. sighs.

Def, my mum and i did not sleep well last night cos' we had to look after baby boy with extra care. No worries, i bought him to the KKH- A&E, Baby precious was infected virus infection and his pathway has alot of flame.. *tsk*

ME: How did he get infected?

DOC: Well, many reasons for getting infected such as, family members feeling unwell and passed it to him. Another reason may be the environment outside. So he'll have his fever on and off for 3 days.

Baby Boy is weighing at 8.2kg! (:(: No wonder my hands are always aching when carrying him.

Tml will be going for Amy's Son full month celebration.. The thought of travelling down to there kills!! SENGKANG! =X I shall make a trip down and see the lil boy..hahas. Might travel down to nuh, my great grandma was admitted to the hospital again. ): sighs. It's the 3/4 times.. Had the 6th sense telling me that i should get myself mentally prepared... arghh. I don't want. Wait for baby boy to turn 1year old first!!

Tadah! Hubby is off on Sunday! hehes.

Our plan for that day will be going down to sell our 2nd hand clothes and etc.. hehes.

Wish us earn money money $$$$ eh..

After that, going back home..

Okay, shall end here. Hubby is coming back home soon.. Got to take the flu medicine and have some nap..

Before that, those pictures below are Jayden recent photo.. (: Enjoy!

Inside his sarong(yao lan), he would always smile like this to me whenever he wakes up. Melts my heart whenever i see this smile of his.. (:(:

Look at his stunned look.. hahas. He is growing up so fast each day..

Look at this! He would always make this facial expression whenever he wakes up.. so unglam right? hahas. shall showed it to him when he grows up.. (:

2010-07-13T21:12:00.002+08:00

Life's fragile.
Cherish your love ones before it's too late.

你就这样离开，一时之间叫我很难接受。
Even up still now, i couldn't accept your so sudden departure.
Though we have only been seeing each other since i have moved in, every day except for the weekends.
In future, i'll miss hearing your voice from my house.
Miss the talking that we had like we used to whenever i'm outside carrying precious.
Miss you telling me which HK drama is nice to watch, thus lending me the disc to watch..
We had the same common loves, which is love to watch HK drama.

When i returned home on Sunday night, i heard the bad news from my mother-in-law.
I was shocked, many WHYS came to my mind.
I was thinking, the very last breath that you will struggling to fight for, did you came across that your children are still very young?They still need you to guide them, to teach them, to cook for them, to see them growing up, and many more.. Or is everything fated to be?
When i was at your wake, the teachers came over asking your kids how are they feeling..
I was observing your kids..they looked so disheartened.
The look from them, my eyes were filled with tears. Then i was trying to make myself distracted.

Tml will be the last day. I know you'll be worried for your kids.
No worries, they have plans. If i'm not wrong, they will be staying at our house after they end school, we'll help to look after until their dad comes back and buy them dinner.
For their school work, I'll help them if i know.. If not, there's still someone else.
Def, i'll help to look after them within my reach. To help them coop with their school work.
Hope you'll rest in peace.

I don't know why your departure made a huge impact on me.
Or is it because i'm a mother of a son too.

How time flies, Jayden is turning 8months within 2weeks.
I can't wait to see him grow up!
Now, my only wish was to get away to genting trip. hahas. i need a few days to shop till i drop.
lols. And my next goal will be starting looking for jobs when he's turning 1 years old.
When i settled for a job, my next target will be taking up a yoga lessons. (:
hees.
Gonna stop writing already.
I wanna sleep (:

2010-07-08T22:51:00.003+08:00

Once the feeling is numb, everything has gone down the drain.

As the saying goes, 泼出去的水是收不回来。

We would always quarrel over small things, but as time goes by, i'm lazy to explain the reason.

I can't be bothered. Which is not doing good.

If it's my fault, maybe i'll apologise to you. If it's not, don't expect me to 低声下气！I would throw temper but not to the extend of throwing things on the floor.

To think back, what's the use of holding on to you?

But, whatever it is, i wont regret bringing jayden to this world.

Back then, i had a choice. To choose to bring him to this world and not.

My reason was wanting him to stay, i thought you'll change all or at least some of your shortcomings after getting married. But it seems so wrong..

I still thought he will bring me to Genting this month.. I guess it can't..

I'm not hoping for anything from him anymore. I know that i've said this so many times.

But i guess this is the last.. I wont hope anything from him.

I'm tired of crying every quarrels we had, cos he wont come to u. swipe away your tears.

You wanna cry, go ahead. This is him.

My heart has numb.

Precious 1st teething! (:

2010-07-04T21:27:00.002+08:00

Precious boy had his teething now! I'm like so happy.. to see every stages that he's turning..
Every stages that I'm going through, there is no words to describe unless you got to experience it yourself.. Only then, you'll know how it feels..
Will note down the date of his 1st teeth!! hahas.. He's turning 7months within 4 days.. His teeth is growing.. (",)
What's next? Lots.. Such as, sitting straight without anyone support, crawling, standing up, walking and calling papa, mama. HOPEFULLY, i hope his 1st word will be MAMA.
I think i'll be too happy till i cried? hahas.
How time flies.. soon, it'll be 8,9,10,11 and 1 years old.. and people are starting to plan for a second child.. I was like -.-
Oh well! Not so fast.. I want to put all my attention to precious darling at the time being.. so.. i wont plan for a 2nd want so fast..

Alright, been busy running to Suntec for the past 2 days. Finally, it's over but I've learnt quite a few things.. I guess i'm considered a experienced young mummies.. So if in future, my peers are deciding to have a child.. I don't mind helpin them to look after for the first few months.. Do look for me ya? hahas.

Priscilla came today.. Well, i'm no longer angry with them. Afterall, we have been through so much things.. No point holding on to the past.. ya.. hmmm. alright, got to go..
update again soon(:

2010-06-24T22:41:00.004+08:00

Having the urge now to type it all here (:
Must be missing my aunt so much till i can't sleep ):
She must be on the air-plane sleeping now? hmm, i don't know.. Will only get to see her next year...
Had our family dinner gathering last night. Everyone was there.. (: I hope more of this gathering.. everyone sitting down together.. chit chatting, taking photos.. playing with our cousins.. hahas. Missed those days.. As we grow older.. everyone's busy with their work. Nonetheless, we'll always never failed to celebrate birthday together.. Majority were the NOV BABIES! (: *included me* hees.

2nd Day of menses. ):):
Felt so cramp!! arghh.
It feel so yucky and so sucks whenever menses is here.
Def, mood swings are here. Guys, don't ever blame on your girlfriend... For being unreasonable..
Try to make yourself in their shoes, it doesn't feel good, seriously! If you want to know how the CRAMP is.. 1 Way is to make yourself gastric pain.. then you'll know.. tsk! I feel so shitty yet dearest is not with me here ):

If ever 1 day, i received a bouquet of flowers like this..
Damn, i'll be jumping like TIGER..
But sad to say.. Whatever it is.. Already used to it..
It's so strange.. I love surprises, flowers, teddy bears and etc. Yet my dearest doesn't like flowers, teddy bears, surprises, romantic and etc.. Human are so strange ):

Been dying to have this!! When i first saw this, i asked him if he can give it a try..
know what he reply?
M: What for? go to the shop and buy lar.
Me: -.- the fun of it? arghh.

If only i can bring 1 of them back home.. lols!

Okay, got to go..
see ya! Will update again soon! (:

Movie Date

2010-06-22T19:59:00.003+08:00

Yesterday was a off day cum break day for me! (:

Prepared and headed down back to Hougang to do some house cleaning.. ): While dearest went to played badminton with his friends.

Threw all the dirty shirt to the washing machine, washed his smelly socks, sweep and mopped the floor. Last but not least, i managed to pack his brother table!! Threw away all the pens, color pencils, and those unwanted papers. Like finally.. (:

After that, was waiting for him to come back home and headed off for movie.. *The Karate Kid*

Walked and shopped around at Plaza Sing. Hmm. i bought nothing ): Was hoping to see any bags or wallet. But he say he rather ask my aunt to buy coach for us.. at least the price is affordable and cheaper compared to Singapore. Brought Mango & Watermelon boost drink. hahas. 8.90 for 2!

Ever since i've gave birth to Jayden, yesterday was the first time that i reached home at 9pm. Woahs, missed those days whereby i reached home so late.. hahas. Enjoyed my day b'cos the movie was great! (:

Brought precious boy to my cousin house in the noon, aunt LayHong is leaving to USA this coming Thursday. Couldn't send her off ): Oh Well, Cousin Lucas never fails to make me smile.. hahas. His sweet smile!! He has teething already! That's fast hur.. hahas. Didn't took any taxi today.. hahas. Took train to Somerset, brought color nails. (: It's been a long time i paint my nails.. And.. i'm all alone at home with baby jayden. cos' everyone is having dinner at my uncle's house..

Hopefully, i wished that dearest will spend time with me on his next off day..

There are so many places that i wanna go!! Such as ION, 313..

I know you must be wondering why i haven't make a trip down yet.. mountain turtle right..

NONO! Ever since Jayden's here.. I've not step to there yet!!

2010-06-18T21:37:00.002+08:00

Human's thinking is very funny, indeed.

A moment later yes, yet a moment no.

Hahas! Why am i saying such things like that?

Jasmine came to visit Jayden this late noon.

Was telling her that i'm going for training soon.... (:

Then i was telling her that i'm having second thoughts about it.

Me: When i'm staying at home looking after Jayden, i wish i can look for a job.

Now when i found a job, i wish i can stay home now and not working..

Jasmine reply was: 人的心就是这样，在做怪！

I love her reply to the max! Just like saying, there is always angel and devil in us.

Ya, but no worries. I'll still go for my training no matter how hard it is.

Just that i may consider switching to part time, maybe?

Cos' part time salary is much better than full time. Hmm, but oh well, i'm going to give it a long thought first before i make any decision. (:

Late Update

2010-06-17T21:36:00.011+08:00

Sorry for the late update!! (: It'll be a very wordy post.. (:
Went for an interview this morning, my first interview and it turns out so successful. (:
Must be my face seem to be very friendly and cheerful that's why they want to employ me.. *skin so thick hur*
Alright, JiaYun and Pegan asked me to apply for this job at tanglin halt (Clinic Assistant), which is near my house. 10mins walking distance, simply can save the bus fare! (:
The following day, the HR called me to go down for an interview.

It's abit tough because i've no experience in this area. Therefore, it'll be challenging..
I told her, i love challenging work, i love learning new things. Been stuck at my previous job for 4years! ):
She asked me if i'm able to handle patients who came to the clinic feeling unwell and they just vomited, and would i mind if i will do the cleaning. My reply was, i won't mind because i've met up all kinds of smell in my previous job.
And she asked am i afraid of blood.. coz' some patients would come in having a deep cut, some may feel it's very disgusting or even faint on the spot. During my labour, i've seen all the blood that i've seen. So why should i be afraid of? hahas.
Though the salary is not very high nor low, i guess it's a experience that i wanted to gain..
But if they feel that i can make it, they will increase my salary, so i definitely will try my ultimate best to it. Even how hard the job is, whenever i think of Baby Jayden & Hubby, i guess all is worth. hehes.

Alright, that's all for that topic.
hehe. Baby Jayden is growing so fast, he's 6months going 7months already..
5months plus to go for his 1st Birthday.
Very looking forward to my birthday this year, not because i'm turning 21.
In fact, i'm looking forward to that day whereby Baby Jayden celebrate my birthday together with me, singing happy birthday with me. hahas.
Look at this picture, 6 months old picture. he loves to turn here and there. hahas. Even now, he loves to sleep one side. Just like my style! hehes.

This picture was taken when we were going back to Holland. hahas. was waiting for cab so i took this photo. See, my hubby has become abit chubby already. hahas.
He's cursing me for making him become like this. Both of them look so damn alike. doesn't even have my look. -.-

He isn't ready to make a pose yet. (:

Alright, i think i should end here. it's late.
Going to get some rest. If not, my fever will come back to me.. (:

It's the month of june!

2010-06-01T19:01:00.003+08:00

Hello June, Goodbye May!!

That's how time flies eh.. (:

5 more months to my 21st bird day!

6 more months to jayden's 1st bdae!

cool la.. hahas.. so many things to look forward to.. hehe.

Well, i'm thinking how to celebrate my bdae. lols.

Thus, hoping that hubby will become a romantic person. *shake head*

Okay, this thursday going to kkh for jayden's check up.

Coming friday, everyone going to grandma new house. (:

Going back to Hougang in an hours time.. ):

2010-05-27T22:06:00.002+08:00

I'm feeling better now..
Million thanx to all my friends who were concerned about me. hahas.
On Tuesday, came back home from Holland.. Went to AMK with hubby, jayden and MIL.
Not long after i came back home, i feel so weak.. was wondering why my whole body was aching..
Thinking if i'm going to fall sick or isit i carry baby for a long time..
Then, i felt my body was hot. -.-
hubby asked me to take my temperature and it was 37.7.
At first, i was waiting for him to massage for me when i say my body was aching. He was playing his phone since he came back.. >.<
I went to bed and rest, when it's time to feed baby, i thought he'll feed. BUT NO! tsk! After feeding, i was complaining that i doesn't like the feeling of having fever at the same time, my menses.

Me: Bibi, i very xin ku lea.. hais.
Mingfu: What to do,you tell me... (his eyes was on the Iphone)

Cannot stand him already, so i put baby down on the bed to sleep. I went to sleep. Was waiting when he'll come and attend to me.
Waited about 20mins, he came and asked me to take the temperature again. This time round was 38.2..

Mingfu: Faster go take medicine le, if not tml morning go see doctor okay..
Me: Take medicine first lar..

Went to the toilet after his "big business". Know what? He use finished the toilet paper, he didn't get a new one to replace it. -.-
When i realised it, i was like omg!! Why must it at this point of time?! Menses lea... I shout at him, he still cannot hear me.. I throw something out still no use. wa piang. DMT!
Thus, i went to bathe again. If not, i got no more choice already.
When i stepped out of the toilet, i gave him a very angry face..

Mingfu: Sorry lar, why didn't you called louder?
Me: Hello, tell me who on earth has fever can shout so loud? got the strength meh? If not, still will call sick pple meh?
Totally cannot stand him sia. -.-

Okay, back to my main topic..
Hubby was planning to get away trip somewhere around august or sept.
Cos he'll be going for his reservice in the end of sept ):
So i was thinking to go Bintan Resort. hahas. I would love the scenery and relaxing days for me.
I need some get away trip!! I'm not a robort can work everyday hard-core, washing clothes, socks, doing the house hold work.. It's getting me crazy eh.. But i love doing it since i'm in Sec sch.. For those who were same class with me.. You guys know, i would like to make the place clean and tidy so that's explain why i'm doing so much things in the day time..

Well, my question of the day.
Called me auntie or jie jie?
Tell you more when i get the answers from you guys..

CIAOS! (:

2010-05-23T18:46:00.002+08:00

We can choose who to be our friends but we can't choose who to be our family.

Rebecca & Candy should know what has happened to me recently..

family issues..

I don't understand why my mother is so biased that she doesn't know right or wrong.

All she say was my fault.

My feeling were numb for so many years already.

Ever since from young, my brother will always like to use my stuff without my permission. And when i get angry, my mom will say why are you so self-fish. i was like -.- Is not that issue. Doesn't school teach everyone to ask for permission when you need something?

My 18th Bdae, my dad gave me a sony camera for my bdae gift, i even top up 2oo bucks for it!

After 1 year, HE took it and use it without my permission and when i need the camera, i start to look like mad!! I hate pple who doesn't inform me and the feeling of looking your item high and low is totally sux, okay? Nobody on earth will like that feeling!!

So, last year hubby brought me a camera. Okay, this time round he didn't touch that camera.

There were many items my brother just took it without asking.

-my camera.

-my laptop become his gaming.

-brought a m)phosis pencil case to put my shampoo whenever i come back here. so when i put the shampoo in the bathroom, i forget to keep the case. the next day when i look for it, it's missing.

-Mingfu brought me a ipod charger that can charge using the main switch instead of the comp. then? become his items already.

-my perfume which i brought together with jiayun, is now in his room.

Perhaps there were more, just that i couldn't remembered it for now.

After O levels, my aunt accompany my mum to look for laptop bcos i kept saying that i want a laptop in case ITE needs. Not long after i brought the laptop, he started to use it, starting to download his gaming all inside which make the laptop so lag!! I was so fed-up! So, my last year in ITE, i brought a laptop during march bcos i doesn't want my brother to use. Is not that i don't want to share with him. Is just that he downloads all his dota game and whatever game it is.. And the whole lap-top become so lag, will you feel fruasted?

Few months back, he ask me if i can lend him the laptop for his project work. He say bcos his want is lag and he doesnt want his peers to know the games. -.-

Now, he uses it for his tuition. So, now my laptop got 3 account! Out of the 3, 2 is his!

So that day i was so angry that i posted something on my facebook. with this ( _|_ ) he complained to my mom.

Now, my mom said me..

mom: you want all of us to be unhappy is it?

mom: point middle finger is wrong, you know.

mom: he's your only brother, why must you like that. you were wrong, you know.

ME: YA LA, YA LA. WHATEVER HE DOES IS RIGHT, WHATEVER I DO IS WRONG ONE LA.

mom: I'm not saying whatever you do is wrong, why you always say i stand for him.

Me: Doesn't it show so obvious? LOOK AT THE WAY YOU REPLY TO HIS TALK, AND LOOK AT HOW YOU TALK TO ME?

whenever i ask my mom things or what, she always speaks like she is scolding me..

AND WHATEVER MY BROTHER TALKS TO HER, SHE WILL SPEAK TO HIM LIKE HER BOYFRIEND LIKE THAT. SOFT AND ALWAYS DON'T DARE TO TALK BACK!

Even when Mingfu and i were not married yet, he already can see that.

I can tolerate all this when i'm young. BUT NOT FOR NOW AND IN FUTURE. SERIOUSLY! WHO ON EARTH CAN TAKE IT?

My own house, have a bath-tub. it's like a spa.

In the past, my brother will use it everyday bcos he wanted to see if his face will get better after using it.

okay, he use.

Now, my foot has infected with fungus. so i wanted to try it and see how.

Each time i use, any idea what he'll say?

HE: hui xian spa again ah? ONLY KNOW HOW TO WASTE WATER ONLY.

wow! in the past, he can use it everyday not waste of water la. i use once a week, it called waste of water.

Then he uses the air con every night he sleep is what? Not waste of electricity ar?

After i tag that comment, he finally speaks his true words.

HE: So young give birth already so throw face already, stil wan tag that comment. no manners.

When i tell rebecca about this, her reaction was also that word. I didnt say that word but onli show the drawing.

Now my mom say she's going to buy a new one for him..

can any one tell me is she biased not?

he doesn't have his laptop meh? he alr have 1 big lap-top, 1 small lap-top. stil not enough. see. now they are outside buying another new one.

Few years ago, when i was in secondary school, brother and i had a fight, of cos, mom side him. Dad scolded my brother, then he say he wanted to leave home.. He did went out of the house, but my mom went out to search for him. After that incident, my dad and him doesnt speak to 1 another..

Now, my mom say it's my fault.

I was thinking. It's not totally my fault. Who to blame?

BLAME THE ONE WHO SPOILED HER SON.

isn't it?

I'm too tired! I'm glad or rather happy i gave birth to jayden at a young age.

Because staying at this house will only make me even more unhappy.

And know what, in between the arguments, my mom brought up about looking after jayden.

If looking after jayden makes her spends less time with her son, i won't mind dont coming back every week!

I wish i had rebecca and candy the cliques to meet up and talk about face to face.

Because i've hold my tears ever since yesterday..

I'm afraid i may break down anytime..

Why do i have a mom like this?

Why is it guys are much more important than womans?

So what if my brother's education is higher than me?

I hate it. I really hate to have a brother like this, a mom who always side her son, talk to her daughter like she's going to scold her or what.. But when talking to her son, she will be like his gf..

If can, i wish i wont have a mother and a brother like them.

Though i know many things happened for a reason. That doesn't mean i have to tolerate all this. I'm not borned to tolerate all this. Perhaps i'm born to be treated this way.

在我影像之中，我永远都记得你对弟弟的好，你给他的爱。永远都是你的第一位。

我好像都没有快乐的童年，所以将来我一定会给义恩一个很快乐的童年。

if i have a daughter in future, i will treat them equally. Yes. i'm sure i'll do that because i know how it feels. I won't allow my kids to feel this way. I will let them know how their mummy has been treated.

2010-05-13T19:07:00.009+08:00

Just had my dinner with my family (:
Went to Lot 1 to had lunch with Candy.. (",)
Didn't meet her since 1234567890234 days..
She made kimchi for my mum. In return, i treat her eat Long John Silver.. I always remembered that Chester would always say it's Short Mary Gold.

Some over-due pictures!!
Took using the web-cam. I didn't know that i can take pictures using the web-cam.

Was taken on Sat 8May. (:
was hard to make him look up, that's why i had to use my hand to put at his chest.

I love this!

And in the noon, was chatting with ibsen.
The conversation was like this;
Ibsen: Nowadays u like to go swim huh..
Me: Ya lor.. How u know ar??
Ibsen: Look at your pictures.
Me: Oh ... ya lor.. wanna slim down ma..
Ibsen: I think getting fat alr, want to go exercise.. But my mum say my face getting skinner and sharper..

Then i started to draw this on MSN.
The next moment, he put this as his DP. I was like -.-
If you wanna put, should inform me first, then i will draw a nice want for you. I don't know where to hide my face. >.<

2010-05-10T11:58:00.003+08:00

Monday Blues ):

Waiting for mummy to bring back lunch for me..

Can't stand the weather recently.. Too hot already..

It's making my head spinning like crazy..

Going down to orchard later.. Perhaps going to the National Library first.

I've owned the library a few dollars ever since baby jayden was inside my tummy till now =/

Going to shop around orchard alone.. Erm, Ever since jayden was born, i always go shopping alone. Unlike in the past, i wont even go shopping alone!! hahas. I guess this is the difference between married life and single life. lols.

Can't possibly i ask my friends out to accompany me to buy some baby daily stuff then we'll go back home.. -.- I think my peers will killed me for that. Who knows, they don't even dare to go out with me when i asked them out again.

Normally, i will travel down to heartland mall to buy some baby stuff.. Such as his bath liquid or shampoo is finished. I'll get it.. If not i'll just wait till i come back to my mum's place.

As you know i wont left baby under my mother-in law care. She really scared the hell of me.

Even thought there are many times, i told myself to close 1 eyes.. But sometimes i just can't..

相见容易，相处难!

Not many people will want to live with their mother-in-laws seriously..

So i'm working hard now to find a contract job.. save money..

For our future house..at the same time, i can think how i'm going to decorate the house..

By then, I wants to give Jayden a younger brother / sister.. Hahas. I hope is a girl..

(Y) If is a boy.. -.- i'll continue to try harder but i'll stop at the age of 30!!

There are many advantages to give birth early.

-You won't scared your size will go out of shape..

Take me, nobody can see that i actually give birth to a kid already. (: I didn't much weight after birth. Only when i'm expecting, my size is like a balloon..

- You and your kids wont have age gap..

In future, i can bring jayden out with me for a facial treatment. Tanning session if he likes (:

Bring him go shopping with him, who knows pple may think he's my boyfriend..

Tml going to bring him to polyclinic for his 3rd dose injection.

This time round, my mom is not going with us. ):

I'm afraid of carrying him, you knows.

My son cry very loud when he's taking his injection..oh my..

nvm, i shld be brave abt it.. hahas! Me, myself is afraid of taking injection already, yet i still have to hold my son and see him taking his injection.. =X

Going to try taking bus with him..

Got to stop here then. see ya!

2010-05-09T11:17:00.002+08:00

I'm sick of quarreling the same topic almost every-time.
And now i'm having the idea of bringing up baby all by myself. Yes, all myself.
Any idea chen mingfu wan to do? We all already had say that during nov we'll bring baby back to his home-town and let his relative see him.
Now, he asked me if june we wanna go bring baby in.
Tell me what's your reaction if you hears this?
I bet mothers will have the same reaction with me. _|_
You're making my blood pressure go high.
Seriously, it's very obvious that i don't want baby to be close to your mum.
Tell me who on earth will accept all this?
FIRST-she likes to give baby drink water when he cries.
HELLO! When a baby cries doesn't mean that he's thirsty!! There were many reason behind it, okay! such as, his stomach is not feeling well, he wants to burp, he feel hot/cold.
SECOND- Your mother's cooking.. She is cooking almost fried and fried for dinner EVERY single DAY. HOW ON EARTH I'M GOING NOT TO WORRY ABT BABY'S DIET?!
THIRD- Your brother is taking soft drinks as water. wtf! and ur mother is not saying anything and just let him do so..
There are many things.. i dont want to type it here.. some of my friends may know it.

Why i always doesnt want baby boy to be close to ur family?
I feared that baby will get influence by your brother all his bad habits.
Ask him do home-work, wants to sleep.
If he's my son, you'll see how i treat him.
Your dad don't beat, i'll.
When you don't teach them a lesson, they will crawl on top of your head.

Don't ever make me to choose that decision.
Now, you are making me so pissed.
The idea came across to my mind now.
I won't mind raising baby myself. I can just go find a job and earn money for the both of us.
From now on, i've no interest about your things now and in future!!!

Baby Boy

2010-05-07T20:47:00.007+08:00

Happy Advanced Mother's Day!! (:

This year, Precious Jayden is celebrating this special day with me.. loving him loads..

he's turning 5months old tml!! so looking forward to every 8 of the month..

My precious bao bei!!

Took this with him this morning!! hees!

Rebecca!! I got photo to put my iphone's skin already!! (:

Look at my smile.. i love this picture to the max!

Seeing how happy i'm..

All i could say is.. i'm happy that i made the right decision.. by bring baby to this world to share every moment together with me. *happy* There's more down the road..

And.. He's learning how to turn already!! *yipee*

His First Kiss to Mummy!! hahas! Daddy was so jealous when he see this picture..

Jayden seldom smile to his daddy.. and sometimes he doesn't want hs daddy..

That makes him so angry.. partly because daddy is working the whole day.. when he reach home, he's already sleeping le.

My preciois baby boy.. 4months plus going 5 months le..

Jayden telling mummy he's tired and doesnt want to take pictures already.. ):

Does he look more like me or mingfu? (:

My brother is always wanting to carry him.. look at how jayden look.. lols.

Whenever my brother carry him, he doesnt dare to move at all.. not a single move..

2010-05-02T16:38:00.007+08:00

tempted to tan once again! ):

Yeah, i'm crazy! Crazy in love with tanning! *loves*

This time round, i went there alone. Yes alone! *hees*

My tanned legs! shiok man!!
Opps! =X Caught my nose? It's red like hell!

My shoulders are burning red too!!

Hubby still wanna hit my shoulders!! Whoever hits my shoulder, i'll give him/her a slap!!

Except for baby jayden! hahas. *biased*

His tiny hands in my hands!! look so cute!!

His feet and my feet!!

My precious baby!!

Soon, i'll be alone with precious baby..

Brother went out, parents going to woodlands for dinner, grandma's birthday celebration cum Mother's Day!

All of them are eating the good foods while me staying at home with my precious jayden.

That's so unfair!! *pouts*

tsktsk!! i wonder how i shld pass the time then.

shall stop here then. (: shall blog when i'm free again! (",)

Tanning Session (:

2010-05-01T21:52:00.008+08:00

Yah!! I'm so happy that i took a picture with the Chipmunks!!

Had tanning session with Magdeline. Supposed to meet her at 1130am. As usual, i'm always late whenever i meet with my peers. I ended up meeting her at 1pm!! ):

After tanning session, met hubby for dinner. He waited for me at the bus interchange..

Hubby was talking to sherwin at RSH. Then we walked out of the shop, i saw CHIPMUNKS!!

ME: BI, take out my camera.. i want take picture with them!! Aww, so cute!!

HUBBY: Hais, you think you still children meh??

ME: ya hor.. like no adult take picture with them hor.. Haiya, dun care liao!!

Can you see me smiling so happy in this photo? *Loves*

Okay, so today's weather was SUPER DUPER GREAT!!

Joke of the day, i was lying on the bench sun-tanning. Magdeline was eating her fish..

Then she told me that just now got 1 indian guy asked if he can take a photo of us..

then she told him NO!!

I was totally engrossed with my sun-bath! lols.

She stayed inside the pool all the while. hahas.

While, only i knows, god knows, and she knows.. (:

See, told you right! She was busy eating the moment we got a place. While i was busy applying my sun tanning oil! GOLDEN TANNING OIL!!

Time for wash! (:

see our rosy cheeks!! hahas! i'm more towards black on my body but super red on my cheeks! hahas!
Friendship Never Ending!

Shall tan again soon yeah?

Had Soup Spoon for dinner.
Yeah, i'm on diet now. hahas.
PLanning to eat kaya toast bread for breakfast. For Lunch, perhaps salad or some light meals. Dinner wil be just plain rice with vegetables.
I'm stopping the amount intake of meats recently.
And i don't know why i love eating vegetables now. After giving birth to Jayden, i love eating it till now. AND, i've been eating for weeks already.. Yes! Rice and Vegetables only!!

Last night met up with rebecca for dinner.
Had Long JOhn Silver.. =X sinful dinner!
After dinner,went to GWC. wanted to wait for hubby to end work.
Then mummy called me, heard jayden's loud crying sound.
wa, i quickly rush back home. took a cab back then run back home. arghh.
know what? Jayden miss his mama.. hahas!
When i carry him, he kept quiet and fall asleep soon in my arms!! (:

okay, shall stop writting here. hahas. Jiayun text me saying that i looked super duper tanned now. i'm like flying in the sky already. hahas.all thanx to the GOLDEN tanning oil.
Shall tan again next weekends!! (:

Counting Down to Jayden's 5th Month!

2010-04-28T09:34:00.003+08:00

10 more days to Baby 5th Month!
Time flies. Soon i'll be counting down to 6,7,8,9,10,11 and 1 YEARS OLD.
woots!
Went for a facial treatment last Sunday at my house downstairs.
Totally awesome!! (: All the lil white dots is gone.. *happy gal!
$45 bucks for soo much things.. it took about an hour.. It's worth la..

Last Sat met up with JiaYun for dinner at Soup Spoon.. It's been years since i ate that.. *.*
Now, looking forward to Sat. Cos i'm meeting Magdeline for tanning session!! woots.
I swear i'm going make myself tanned till super gold-tan color.
Going back to mum's place every weekends.. enjoy myself as while as to get much more sleep..

Oh I'm celebrating Mother's Day this year! (:
Didnt know until mother-in-law told me that 9May is mother's Day.
Peeps, what you waiting for?Hurry go get your mama's present..
For me, baby is still young.. hahas. But nvr mind.. I've still tons of years to celebrate with him!!
Teehee! I'm looking forward to Baby First turning, First words, hopefully is mama! lols.

Yeah,and hubby is going to taka addias to work starting tis sat.. can reach home slightly earlier compared to RSH.
Thanx to some troublesome pple, he got to transfer out. Doesnt know why the head is so afraid of that stupid woman. Isit so hard to sack her? lols.
Nvm, hehes. In the meantime, 'll just keep a look-out to help him find a job... (:

Okay lar. Shall stop writting here.
Got to go for my breakfast with Honey darling.. He just woke up.. (:
See ya!! TATA! (",)

Jordan's 10th Bdae! (:

2010-04-19T19:05:00.004+08:00

Went back home on Sat Morning. (:
Was planning to go back home on evening that day, but change of plan.
Cos the next day they were celebrating Jordan's bdae.

Birthday BOY!
Birthday Cake!
Cousin Dillion!! I love this picture that i took very much!!
I asked him to pose a picture for me, then he gave me this.. (:
I always played with him since he was born.
But giving birth to Jayden, he doesnt really tend to look for me already.. ):
I love teri's reaction in this picture.. wahaha!
Cousin Teri, Cousin Jasmine and Cousin Jordan.
The children were snatching my bath-tub. lols!
Yeah! I hope more of this gathering soon(: hehes.
Went to see doc this morning. tsk!! Flu & Sore-throat.. ):

Dear's 25th Bdae! (:

2010-04-15T10:05:00.007+08:00

YoYo!! Sorry for the late updating..
Went to JB -uncle's house to celebrate dear's bdae..
Went to GWC to wait for him to end work then go straight to woodlands checkpoint.
Took a cab down from GWC.
Reached there, there were no crowd. (:
Means i can faster reach Johor. hahas. My cousins were waiting for me at home..
Reached uncle's house before 11am. (",)

Packed stuffs and played with them awhile and we went to turn in.
Erm, i couldn't sleep at all. Cos, my legs were so itchy that i couldn't sleep.
Was around 4am, i asked dear to accompany me down to watch tv. hahas.
Then, he sat there and sleep while i watch tv..lols.
So i watched till i fall asleep. (:
Woke up around 7plus.
Cousin Benjamin woke up and switch on the tv to watch his cartoon.
Then awhile later, Cousin teri woke up and came down too.

Went out around 10am. Baby Lucas also woke up and bathe alr.

Cousins they all went to shop, uncle send us to the Jusco which is not near to his place. Further down more.. I promised dear i'll bring him down the next time we go in.

It's big enough for us to shop. Basically it's more for me to shop =P

We went to eat our breakfast first, Pizza Hut!! Their service was excellent! (:

Shopped quite alot of stuffs. I bought myself a grey dress, a shirt for mummy, a specs for brother. Quite a few clothes for baby..

Also, i bought diapers from there. 2 big packets. Mummy Poko(: Quite cheap..

After shopping, went back to uncle's shop and rest awhile before going to Holiday Plaza!! When we reached the shop it was 430pm. hahas! Played with them awhile.

A Cake from me to dear. The cake was nice, not sweet but not bad.

Hees. Baby Lucas and me.

Dear and Lucas. (: Cake cutting.

Close Shop. Getting to go home.. (:

When we were closing shop, this tiny kitten was standing outside my uncle shop's gate.

Yeah. Then home sweet home.

Monday came back from mum's side. Now staying at hougang luhs.

Yeah! that's all about it. Going to prepare jayden's milk(:

2010-04-04T20:42:00.002+08:00

Aww! Honey Baby reached Singapore already. (:
Now, i'm waiting for him to come here.. Wanna hug him tightly!! (",)
Got so much things to tell him.. ):
Not looking forward to what he has brought.. Bcos he had told me the shirts over there looked very aunties.. -.-
So we planned to go to JB on his birthday eve. Must see his off day..
So happy lar.. My virgin trip with him. (: no need to worry abt the place to stay, cos i can just go over to my uncle's place and stay overnight. Who knows he may offered us to send us back to ssingapore! (: We shall see! Shop,shop, Shop and Shop. It's been 123456789 days since i've shopped..

Was soo bored when honey wasn't with me. So i went to photoshop the pictures..
There's still looads of pictures.. Found some cutey for jayden.. Shall upload the next post! (:

I miss Mr Ting so much! Wish you were by my side now. ): hahas!
25th Birthday is on the way. 1 year older le. (:(: Been with you for 3++years. But only officially celebrated your birthday once and this coming one is the 2nd time. There's more to go!!
Endless Love <3!>

Our Sweetie Bao Bei, Jayden!
4 more days to 4months old! Baby Boy is growing up!!
Today i sang him the nursery songs to him, he was smilling to me. He knows mummy is singing to him.. (:(:
He ah woo ahh.. Though i dont know what he is talking about.. I know that he is starting to know that i'm his mummy!!
Looks like his daddy more now.. ): what about me?? Nvm. I should plan for the 2nd child.
Prayed loads, hoping for a girl. hahas.
What if, it's a boy again?? O.o

Darling Boy!

TAHAHA! Whenever i'm back to mum's place.
I'm in paradise.
Due to my sensative skin i had, whenever i comes back, i'll put the water and spa. Jacuzi. (correct spelling?) Ya.. And it really helps alot.. Now, my leg's skin is getting better..
When baby boy grows up.. i will let him try this..

3RD APRIL.
Magdeline came over in the late noon to see his god-son.
This silly girl ah.. dont dare to tell me what has happened to her for the past few months..
When i asked, she kept quiet and i found something not right.. silly girl.. yeah. she stayed till around 8plus and off to meet her boyfriend for a movie date. (:

Going to bring baby boy for a jab tmr morning which is 8am!! -.-
Heading back to sch in the noon to get my cheque then going for my dental appointment.
Getting my retinas tmr!! =D
O.o A form of slimming myself.. hahas!
Got to stop here. HOney is reaching soon!! (:

Congrats to sherwin and Serene on their 1st Anni!! <3!>

Bunch of idiots!

2010-03-31T17:51:00.003+08:00

Heading off to great world city to wait for lao gong to end his work.
I'm officially off after 9pm! He's going back to m'sia tmr night.
Baby Jayden got to leave to my mum to baby-sit for just a night. (:

Had edited my friends list on my facebook.
Deleted a few friends. They know who they are. I don't have to type their names out, seriously.
They know what they have done. I MUST SAY THANK YOU TO THEM WHEN THEY EVER CAME ACROSS HERE!
Seriously, i hated them for only 1 thing.
After hearing some rumours, i sweared i hate them for a life-time.
Know what they have done?
They bad-mouth about my husband.
Saying that my husband's salary is it enough to feed us.
saying that my husband is ill-treating me. Treating me not good.
Which i can say they are all f***ing idiots! They didn't know the story behind,what's the point saying bad abt him?
Who say his salary is not enough? Baby Jayden's milk and diapers, we don't have to worry.. Bcos his grandfather is buying for him. We got enough stock. Any idea what is buffet stock!? It means we have more than enough!!!

The last gathering with them, my husband was waiting for me.
They were saying that when my friends were around, my husband pretended to care for me.
They saw that when they were not around, my husband put down his hands.
I was like what the hell!
They are a bunch of monkeys! Or i can say even worst than it!
They are really making me very pissed off!
i deleted them in my facebook, blocked them on my msn.
I WILL NEVER EVER WANT TO SEE THEM AGAIN IN MY LIFE!
Not to reply my message is already very fuming enough, yet they are doing such things.
I just hope they have their retribution!
When their big's day, hopefully, i hope there's people doing back the same as what they did to me.. And let them know how i feel!

I could never imagine that, all this people who were once my good friends treat me like this. And I knew them since it was secondary 1. 5 of them!!! Worst, 1 of them who bad-mouth my husband was the one i knew since primary sch!

To my dear jasmine lam, if you are reading this, you should know why i didn't invited them for baby's full month. So what if you came and visit me and baby for a few times already? Just tell them straight in their face and don't bother to hide it from them.
Better, for your big day, don't ever invite them. Waste of money, waste of time,effort,messages..

Making me so angry.. ARGHHH!!

2010-03-30T22:00:00.003+08:00

Actually i wanted to update my post with a happy mood.
Few minutes ago, someone just spoiled my mood.
1st Gd News:
I got a letter from school which is the GOOD PROGRESS AWARD, asking me to go down to school to collect a cheque of $400.
2nd News i didn't really want to type it here.
So my close friends,i can tell you what actually happens.
sigh.
My tone of voice was happy..till i hear that tone of yours! It's really making me crazy!
Think about it if you were in my shoes lar.
Turns me off totally. i should say thank you for being that?

Random

2010-03-20T10:48:00.002+08:00

woos!
time flies! I'm counting down to baby boy's 4months!!
Watching him growing up everyday really makes my day even how hard it is..
He will smile to us when we called his name.. awesome sweet boy!
I want to see his growing up slowly..to enojy the best moments together with him.

Rains rains rains..
My clothes,undergarment, baby's clothes are pilling up..
Bcos of the weather,i can't do anything. ):
Made my dental appointment. Tue. *Grins*
Going to put my retina back..
Brought baby boy flash cards.. Going to start him early.. (:

Dear Birthday is coming soon too..
Wonder if i can bring baby out by then..
Hmmmm..

hahas. Gonna stop here..
Update when i got the time.
Baby boy is moving here and there..
Ciao!(:

Delivery Process

2010-03-11T21:52:00.016+08:00

As promised, here are the photos taken recently..
Do forgive me, cos this post may be very wordy.. ):
Hahas! My darling Yi En has turned 3months on Monday! (:
Time flies. Blink of an eye, he has turned 3months old already.. Soon it's going to be 4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11...and then towards 1 YEARS OLD!

His papa carrying him.. He love people to carry him like this.. He wants to kpo.. lols.
He wanna see what's going on outside the world.. (:

HAPPY 3MONTHS OLD DARLING!
Taken before we go to the hospital for checkup. Yes, both of us.
Sometimes, i'm abit tired to keep going to kkh for checkup. Cos' it is like almost once a month..
Only can blame that i got to know my pregnancy at second trimester. which is like 4months.
Hence, the doc asked me to do a blood test, amniocentesis to see if baby got any down syndrome. Lucky there wasn't any bad news.
That's why when baby boy was borned, the doctors had a closely investigations on him.
About the sis in the kidney, his neck strength, his renal and so on.. ONE word to describe. TIRED.
As time goes by, really prayed hard that one problem will be gone one after another..
Anyway, I'm glad that the sis in the kidney is descending. When the doctor told me that " the sis in the kidney has disappeared, left with just a tiny dot on 1 side." I was like so happy.. Thank God. Bcos of this, went to many doc as the doc refer here and there. Lols. They fear that it may lead to kidney problems in future.. Down with one. Oh Yeah..

10 March. Appointment with my Gynae.
ps: Is my Gynae pretty? hahas. She's even more pretty in person!

She was the one who brought baby to this world.. (: I would recommend to my friends to see her..
She's really good!! hahas! Though, she has only seen me for a few checkup..
I guess without her..I would faint during my delivery..

"Thanx" to dear for taking such a wonderful picture.. He took onli 1 shot. arghh. Promised to take again next year when i go for my follow up..

How's my delivery process?
Everyone should know that 6 Dec'09 was my chinese custom wedding eh. Lunch buffet.
The next day, Dear and me woke up ard 10plus.. His relatives were all preparing to go to sentosa for bbq session. I didnt wanted to go as i'm too lazy to travel as i'm also afraid that baby boy would come out anytime.. As my Gynae told me that baby going to reach his full terms on the 11dec Wed. Yeah, so Dear went to order Mac for breakfast as he was lazy to go out and have his breakfast too. 大姐and表姐 was also lazy to go out that day too.
After our breakfast, played comp awhile and went to lie on the bed.. Was talking to dear on the bed..
Me: Have you decided boy boy's name? Got any names that you liked?
Dear: Don't know ah.. I'm very bad at names..
Me: Alemak.. !@#$%^&* saying all the names that i could think at that moment..
As i've told him that i thought of using 毅恩.Why i wanted this name was bcos.. i wanted him to be royal to his friends/family..毅气. 恩是因为，我想要和老公和儿子，我们一家三口永远都恩恩爱爱。

*After giving birth, we went to find the fortune regarding baby's boy name and they gave me 义恩 this name. I was like.. My mind,brain and heart is telling me that okay..i just want this name and no else!

Finished saying, i felt something discharging below. Thus, i went to take a look. And i saw brown bloody shows..
Me: Am i going to give birth soon? Oh my god.. How?!
Me: Wait, i read through the books. They stated there when i saw shows, i should remain calm and tell myself that i'm going through labour anytime. Therefore, i have to get mentally prepared that i'm going labour anytime.
Then, i text Jiayun and Candy. Told them what happen.. They asked me to go to the hospital.. But i was like.. Eh,I'm not in pain lea.. So i went to computer and check online. It says, labour is coming on the way..

Then, i packed my stuff, cab down back to my house - Holland. Get my admission stuffs. Then rushed back to kkh. They send me to a room, and dear was supposed to wait outside for me.
Inside the room, all you could hear is baby's heartbeat. They gave you something to wear on your tummy to monitor baby's heartbeat. The nurse then come and see how much you have dilate. The nurse told me that the baby's head is facing down already and i've dilate 2cms. They gave me 2 options. 1st: You can go back home first, when you fell pain or anything, you can come back. 2nd: You can do your admission stuffs, stay here and let the nurses observe the situation.
Of cos, I took the 2nd option. It's my first baby,i am afraid of what would happen..so i took the 2nd choice.. Yes, admission is done. So i stayed at the ward doing nothing except watching tv..

Mum came together with Dad to visit me. I told them i don't fell any pain except that there are some contraction in the middle of the time. But it was manageable. Looking at my mum's facial expression, i knew that she's somehow worried for me though she didn't say it out. Still, i can feel it. By looking at her red eyes. They stayed with me till 8plus 9pm,they went off. Aunt called me and asked how i feel..lols. Dear accompany me all the way except that the nurses on duty kept chasing him. But i insisted as i was really scared to be alone. Until really cannot le, Dear went outside to sit.. But i couldn't sleep at all. Lol. Contractions starting to come on and off like every 4min.. Then i asked the nurse lo, the nurse say where got 4mins, is like 2 mins. i was like wadever la.. cannot dong the pain le.. So she sent me down to the delivery ward. I asked dear to join me. So i was asked to change to a set of clothes.. lols. It's like almost not wearing.. ):

They started to put this and that on my tummy. Insert a tube on my hand, yucks! The needle is so thick and long lo. By looking at it, i want to faint lo. I was troublesome also, each time i want to go toilet. I got to call a nurse then they have to stop the baby's monitoring machine,untie the things on my tummy then do it all over again. They somehow don't really like the idea of me going toilet so many times.. I know what they fear for. So every 1/2 hours, the nurse will come and check how much i've dilate.. And i was telling dear, each time when they want check how much i dilate, it feels so terrible la. Told him that for the first time in my life, i felt so scared and pain.. Arghh. Each time their fingers went in,it was like so terrible pain lo! tsk! The contraction was so manageable, just that my legs were so pain that i could hardly sleep a few mins. I was so tired yet i couldn't sleep. So they gave me a injection on the thigh so that i wont feel anything on the legs. It's good for early labours. And Yes, it really helps alot. At least,it could help me sleep for a few hours in between.

Here comes the nurse/midwife on duty came, she's very good. Jokes with me.. hahas. And almost all of the nurses came, they say.. "wa,ur baby is so tiny.. see your tummy above still got alot of space.hahas" My midwife told me that my Gynae will come tml morning to see my condition.. So, my Gynae came at about 9plus in the morning, she told me " hello hui xian, eh wont we supposed to me on fri for ultrasound?" Me: yeah lor..but baby is too excited to come out to see you.. (: Then she decided to burst my water-bag. A gush of water just flow out..Felt the water so warm. hahas. Then they montior.. at about 2plus, they say i've dilate to 6cm.. My reaction was like.. Huh? Why still so slow? I asked the nurse, water bag burst le, baby still can survive inside? I thought the water-bag was supposed to protect baby? The nurse told me as long as it is within 24hours. So they observed until 3pm,they decided to put drip so that i could dilate fast.Indeed, it really speed up! Dilate to 9cm and i can start preparing for pushing.
Hell loads! I told dear, why they can't put the drip earlier on? So i dont have to wait until now.. Dear: 8 Dec would be a nicer date.. FA FA.. i was like.. Okay.. (",)

Just so nice, My Gynae was at the next door.
As her patient is also giving birth soon!! !@#$%..I was like..so qiao?!
My mid-wife told me to start pushing when the contraction comes..
123 push....
AH YES, SEE BABY'S HAIR..
I can't see anything, dear told me..he saw it..
hahas! Feeling was like something stuck down there and you just feel like pushing it all out once and forall.. just like a terrible tummy upset..
Push and PUSH.. Until i was so terrible that i didn't follow the instruction that was told by the nurse to PUSH ONLY WHEN CONTRACTION COMES. Here comes my Gynae.. Asking me to push and push.. She sees that i was like no strength, so she told me that she would use vacuum to take baby out cos she's afraid baby stay inside too long would distress baby's heartbeat. Vacuum is not like those when you are doing household chores.. It's looks like something to clip on baby's head and the doc uses their force to pull baby out..

When baby's out, they showed me and tell me, jamie, you see..it's a boy!! i was like.. my precious is finally out..I started to vomit..All in green. My mum told me i vomited my guts out. True actually, i didnt take anything for 2days..Yet,i can still vomit..lols. What makes me upset was dear didn't cut off the cord between me and baby boy. My Gynae asked him to cut..He say he don't dare =.= Then baby boy was put to one side and the nurses need to clean him up, take his weight,measurements and bla bla..

After pushing baby out, the next one -Placenta.
Gosh, It was like so big lor.. Can't imagine it stays inside for 9months together with baby boy.
Soon after, a male doc and my Gynae came to stitch my below.. tsk! I would somehow feel the pain when they were stitching.. After stitching, i was lying on the bed waiting for the nurses to clean me up.. I told dear, my hair how ah..i vomited some on my hair.. ): Waited and waited.. I asked dear to call my mum.. cos my mum has been waiting outside the delivery room since 5pm with dad.. and my aunties came too. He gave a call to mum and say baby boy is going out too. hahas. Sat on the wheelchair, felt so giddy..gosh!And so pain sitting.. Went back to my ward.. complanning how pain it was,telling my parents that 1 is enough already. And they were laughing. I knew that my mum and dad's eyes were abit red.. As thought they hab cried.. I know they must be heart-aching to see me going through this.. Lie on the bed straight and it's so hard to get myself to see. Cos i cant make any movements. Whenever i closed my eyes telling myself to go to bed, images of the doc stitching my below kept flashing. Arghh. Yet, the nurses asked me to go urine within 5hours after birth. If not, they won't let me discharge the next day.
Couldn't sleep till i asked the nursed for panadol or painkillers.. ): After taking it, felt so much better.. At least i could sleep..

Yupp. My birth experience. (:
To think back now.. Everything was worth looking at how cute baby is now (:

Went to watch "Being Human" at 3pm at cini. It's been so long since i've stepped into a cinema.. My last show was " This is it" on my bdae. hahas! the show was a comedy. Not bad(:
Then walked to Taka and saw there's Baby Fair.. Dear regretted walking there.. Hahas. Cos we've brought a steamer and blender for baby boy. It's a 2 in 1 thing. $199 comes with a $50 voucher.
Then walked to Wisma to get my camera repaired..
Cotton On sales 50% sales.. Went in and get a few clothes.. wahahas! Paid by my own money! hahas. Get a cardigan for $12.50, a top for $10, a pants for mum $10.. Going to hit there again either tml.. hahas. To take my own sweet time and shopp.. Cos that day, dear was there.. and i didn't really take my own sweet time and shopp.. As you (girls) know, if your guy were to stand down there quietly, you will feel uneasy to take your own sweet time and shopp.. So, it's best to shopp with your BFF or alone. (:
Took a bus back home. Dropped at Holland Village to have our dinner before dear went to GWC.

SWENCENS! MY TREAT OKAYS!
I orderd Curry Chix Baked Rice, as usual for him- FISH & CHIPS. Also Prawn Dippers & Ice Lemon Tea.

TAHAHA! My Ice-Cream of the day.
One scoop as i wasnt feel like eating much,plus dear doesnt wanted to eat too.
One scoop of Sticky Chewy with Strawberry fruit toppings.. (:

Time to feed him.. He overshot his time again ): hahas.
It's a long post. (:

2010-03-02T13:31:00.002+08:00

Dealing with menses cramp is so tiring! ):
Got to wash this and that, so tired!
Lucky dear is off today.
Know what? Yesterday when he came back.. i asked him to feed baby through-out the whole mid-night. Lols.
Good hor. But still, i feels that i'm not having enough of sleep.
Cos i got to wake up and prepare the milk for him.

Arghh!The stupid payar lebar air base..
They are disturbing my baby jayden's sleep.
So to all my friends..If you are going to buy a house..
Make sure there's no air base nearby..
If not, you going to suffer when your baby cant get to sleep..

And.............
It's time to visit the dental soon.
Shall wait for dear's next off day..
(:
I wonder what should i tell the doctor why i missed my last session..

2010-02-25T20:38:00.003+08:00

Latest photo of Baby Jayden (:

Day 1 With us!

Update more soon!

2010-02-11T10:34:00.003+08:00

Everyday is a challenging day to me.

Many and tons of endless work to do... Haha! I'm not complaining about the things i'm doing.
Now i finally understand how hard it is for my mother to look after my brother and me.
In fact, all mothers.. (:
Really.. My baby boy has been with us for 2 months and 3 days..
This period of time is hard to cope with yet meaningful to me.
Understanding baby boy needs and stuff. His crying is the only way to communicate with us.
This 2 months, I have slowly got to know what each crying means..
Such as, his diapers is wet, telling us to change his diapers.
He is sleepy, he still want to sleep. He wants to be pamper and hug..
His stomach is feeling unwell, he wants you to carry him and massage him.. So far it is like this..
My cute lil silly boy..

Washing his clothes, sterlise his bottles, washing my hubby's undergarment and also mine.
Packing my room, sweeping and mopping the floor of the house.
By the end of the day, almost half of the day is gone. ): there goes my sleeping time.
Waking up in the mid-night is really dreadful!
Adding on to it, the moment he is awake, he wants his milk already.. Can't even wait.. Not to say change his diapers. Every 3 hours. Lucky his milk time is 3am, 6am, 9am and the cycle goes on..
I could never thought that I'm a mother of a child during the age of 20. hahas.
Some may say that there are too many things out there waiting for me.. Well, it really depends on how you see it.
For me, well, it's true that when i know baby boy's existance. I'm left with just only a choice.
Which is to keep it and nothing else. Cos baby boy is already 4 months (:
Thoughts like oh my god, I'm going to the labour ward just like always see on the dramas.
Pushing and screaming all the way out just to push baby out.
Stitches and blood is what i'm most afraid of.
Looking at baby boy now, i felt everything was worth (:
Though there's one thing that disapoint me which is hubby didnt cut off the cord between me and baby!! Stupid. He's afraid of blood!

This year will definitely be a good year for me..
I'm planning to celebrate my 21st birthday with my dearest boy.
By that time, he's 11 months going 12 months which is 1 years old le.
Inviting all my friends to celebrate this joy together with me..
But definitely not that bunch of friends who say they will be there regardless of what.. Yet when the day is nearer, none of them bother to reply..still care hear from others telling me that they care..
Is this the way they care?!

About my birth process..hahas.
Well, shall update the next post.
Got to attand to baby boy now..
See ya!!

HAPPY TIGER NEW YEAR EVERYONE! (:

2010-02-03T17:19:00.002+08:00

It's been 123456789..... days since i have last blog..
I am almost done with my Chinese New Year's stuff.. Yeah.
Baby boy is doing well..

Oh ya, a big thank you to those who turned up on baby's boy first month..
How silly of me..so busy till i forgotten to ask those who have turned up to take a pictures with baby boy.. hahas! nvm!
Wait till baby boy celebrating his 1st Bdae!
Okay, what's up recently..
met jasmine last week.. had a chit-chat with her. it's really enjoyable.
so must meet up at least once twice a week yeah?? hahas.
And i'm waiting for you to visit me and baby boy.... hurry hor..

Was talking to a friend just now..
so what if they care? If they really care, they should at least bother to text me back.
they didn't send me a text at all.. so is this call they care for me?
bullshit to me!
seriously, they wont understand how i feel back then.
Once a lifetime, i sent a text to them.
No one bother to reply to say if they are coming or not, so i assume that they will come.
bcos we went through up and downs during our sec sch.
Even up till that day when i still haven't received any msg from them so i assume they will come, i order their share too..
Even up till the day,i was still hoping that they will come..
But to a big disappointment, NO they didn't turn up and not even a message from them..
It's not about angry..
It's really a big disappointment or rather i should say..it's sad that i have such friends..

Imagine when it's your big day and your friends that went through thick and thin with you..
They do such thing to you.. it feels really hurt..
even if i met them on the streets one day, i guess i will just walk away.

alright, got to stop here..
Dear is coming to my place tonight. hahas.
yeah, i can get a night off tonight.
wahahas. here comes my sleeping beauty.. (:

They just totally breaks my heart.

2010-01-11T21:43:00.002+08:00

waiting for dear to reach home now. (:
I'm so tempted to eat the chicken wings on the dining table right now ):
just got to bear with it a lil more while.. he's reaching home soon..
baby boy sleeping right now. his next feeding time will be 1030pm.
Brought baby boy to check up this afternoon.
He is doing perfectly fine!!
He's weighing 4.5kg! *.*
poor him, got to take his blood for lab. ):
He's super fussy.. change diaper can cry, hungry cannot wait..
active boy i can say..
well well..
my recent pictures were all inside dear's handphone..
will upload them soon..

Going back home in 2 days time.
Or i can say it's just 1.
arghh.
can't imagine that day.. Mum will be going with me then she will make her way back home in the late afternoon..
Will i be too emotional till i cried?
i hope not.
and the stupid lao gong..
first night over there, he's going to leave me all by myself..
cos' he is going to taka for stock take. Will be back only in the mid-night and he is going to work the following day ):

2010-01-06T18:29:00.003+08:00

Down with 01 more day, but i doesn't seem to be happy at all.
why is this so?
money matters always make people headache.
just wanted to save for future needs/ rainy days.
I won't know what will happen in the future..
Oh Well~
It's raining now.
Was so happy when i saw baby boy's birthmark and wanted to tell you on the phone just now.
but u seem to be down, so i drop that idea of telling you.

time for pumping milk.
see ya(:

2 more days :P

2010-01-05T22:32:00.005+08:00

Finally done with my new layout. (:
All thanx to the old layout.. If not i wont be facing the comp for so long..
Luckily baby boy is sleeping soundly now..

It's been a long time since i've blog eh.
Last Sunday was baby boy's full month celebration.
Was so busy till i forgotten to take pictures with all those who have turned up! ):
Never mind. Perhaps i should type their names here? hahas!
A BIG THANK YOU!! (:
Jia Yun, Claire
Candy, Wei Ling, Chiu Ling, Chester.
Wei Xin, Rebecca & Liwen
Rachel & her boyfriend!! (i miss you so much pinky!! hahas! hope to see you again if you happens to read this)
Sherwin & Serene ( like finally met serene face to face. cos i've been talking to her on msn w/o knowing how she looks like even though there's picture inside facebook.. *.*)
Jasmine & Salleh & Luke
ZhengKai, Magdeline & Tian Xiang , Felicia
Was so busy till i forgot to take pictures! *arghh! How could i..

Couldn't take the food either! ): nvm lar.
I'm still left with 2 days!
Shall just bear with it and lurfes promise to bring me out this coming friday!! (:(:
so looking forward to friday! woos!
I want to bathe myself, perhaps i shld say i wanna soak myself inside the bath tub for at least 30mins!!
Still, got to control my intake of food.
There's 1 layer of fat on my tummy..
Wondering it used to be there before i'm expecting baby boy or is it the fats after giving birth.. Hmm..
Shall visit the gym when i'm free.. miss swimming too!! ):

Daddy's Bdae is coming.. wonder what i should get for him this year..
may not get to celebrate with him this year, like i used to for the past few years..
Oh well, dear cant get to off that day.. it may be troublesome for me to travel alone..
CNY is coming too! so looking forward too!
It's the first year, giving hong baos to pple and not getting from the elders anymore ):
I just loved CNY!
It's a season whereby all of us were gather together sitting together enjoying ourselves.
I just loved it lar.
sigh. This year, god-grandpa is not with us anymore. i miss him just like all of us.

Oh well, i should stop writting.
Got to get back to my baby boy now. He's sleeping so soundly now after his milk.
Been thinking if i shld get some sleep first or wait for his milk time.
Next 1 will be ard 12 plus 1. Depending on him, if he wants to sleep more..then i =.=
Okay lar. Shall update next time with photos eh!

2009-12-20T13:19:00.002+08:00

“我真的不了解你。”
你对我说的这句。。。
Have i made a wrong decision back then?
It makes me think back the past. Not the present.
I thought life will be much better after making the decisions. But it seems the way round!
sigh. arghh, anyway, i'm just complaining..
just hope things will get better soon..
Don't hope for hope.
I guess i'm not expecting much from him either.
cos the more i expect him to be what i wanted/hoped for.. it's always turned out to be a big disappointment.

sometimes,i just wished my boyfriend or husband-to-be to be like those happened in fairy tales.
sweet and romantic to the loved ones.
able to read one's mind without saying/hinting.
lols. Life cant be as perfect as it is as we wanted.

aniway, for baby's boy sake.
No matter how hard the future holds within us..
Still, i'll hold on.. to give the best for my sweetest son! (:
even when there's no one there!

2009-12-17T10:46:00.002+08:00

It's been a long time since i've last blog eh! (:
Been very very busy with baby boy's arrival..
so much things to settle... got to look after him and getting used to wake up every 3 hours to feed him..
It's not tough to be a mummy though.
Be good to your mothers eh! hahas!

And there's a long long list for me to shop when baby boy reaches his 1st month..
hahas~ Shop till i drop!
Wanting to change my current hp. abit sux at times..
Automatically hangs calls itself. ):
Plus it's worth to trade it now..cos my phone still stands $200bucks..
hahas!Been wondering what phone to use..
Dear has reserved a iphone for me.. But i told him i don't want..
Cos i heard from my aunt that the battery go very fast):
Hmmm.. Been thinking to use Sony Ericsson Aino..
Well, i still got time to think before i purchase it.. shall see then..
Not forgetting! Clothing!! In need of clothes badly..
hahas!
If not, i guess i wont hab much time to shop..
And CNY is coming soon~!
Got to give pple hong bao instead of recieving it from others.. ):

okay lar..shall stop till here..
cya!(:

2009-12-02T20:16:00.002+08:00

Finally it's the month of December..
A brand New Year is coming along the way too..
Same goes to my baby prince.. (Y)
Mixed feelings~ Excited, Nervous and Looking-forward.
Aunt Bev is coming back tmr!! Yeah! Just too bad i wont be able to travel down to Changi Airport to fetch her..
Hee! But i'll be waiting fer her at grandma's house..
Getting ready for baby boy's arrival (:

The moon is round and bright tonight!! (",)

2009-11-28T19:25:00.002+08:00

should i go to dear's house later?
hmm.. i'm still thinking to go or not to go..
Reason that i want to go is bcos i want to sleep with dear.. (:
It's been a long time since he is sleeping beside me..
Reason that holds me back is bcos of his younger brother.. Arghh!!
Mainly bcos his younger brother is always following him in and out.. including me!!
Whatever i'm doing.. He'll come and take a look and asking me alot of questions.. Which i don't really like.. Cos i just want time with dear and baby alone..
Thus, when dear's talking to baby.. His brother will be talking nonsense beside us..
i bet baby boy also dislike this uncle of his..
How i wish his brother will faster grow up.. which is impossible..
All i can hope now is to faster apply for a flat.. And just to bear with it for 4 years until i've apply it.. hahas!!

Ookay lar.. shall write till here then.. (:
See ya!

2009-11-28T11:25:00.000+08:00

Awww~ My Aunt has just give birth in the morning!!
hahas! all 3 kids were in the month of Nov!!
Heading off to the hospital to see him now. (:
Soon, it'll be my turn soon!!
okay..
post again later..

2009-11-22T20:43:00.002+08:00

Finally it's over!!
Just too bad that dear wasn't here with us..
*sigh. I had forgotten when was the last time i met him.. Erm, think it was last Friday. Went down to have lunch with him.
Arghh. This week like only spend not much time together.. ):

Anyway, went down with my cousin and aunties to Holland V.
Flea Market!! (:
Walked a few rounds to see if there's anything.. *smiling*
Saw a eeyore handphone holder. But,my cousin wanted it very much.. so i bought it for her.. And i got myself a small eeyore.. (:(: My brother also said the eeyore holder was cute lar!!

Nothing much to write about too.
Dear is busy packing his room also.. had not much time to spend time on the phone with me either!! *cries*

2009-11-20T19:30:00.002+08:00

Yeah! It's Friday..
Weekends is here again!
Nothing special to look forward as i'll be spending my weekends at home alone. Without 陈先生！
He's off on this Sunday but he's going to Ikea to get some stuffs i guess.
My cousins they all will be coming this Sunday for lunch.. Haha! Guess it'll be crowded this coming Sun.. Prayed hard that my grandma won't come here in the morning to cook.
If not, there will be too much things to do/pack when they left. ):
HOPE THAT THEY WILL NOT MESS UP MY ROOM EITHER!!

Days is passing so fast that i didn't realise that the year is ending within a month or so! Oh my god.
Well, really hate that stupid hypocrite brother of mine.
Seriously..
Whenever he needs any help,he'll come and be nice to me..
When his problem is solved.., you'll get to see his that ****** attitude face.

Has been raining for the past few days..
heh! and my nose.. is always giving me problems..
Sometimes my nose will be running like tap-water..
If not in the middle of the night, my nose will be super blocked..
Causing me hard to sleep ah~

Anyway, shall stop writing..
Take Care! (:

2009-11-18T16:03:00.002+08:00

It's raining heavily outside now. Such a wonderful weather to sleep in.. (:
Got to update my post now.. If not, my blog will be so dead..
Baby boy is doing well. No worries. Next check-up will be on 25 Nov! Which is next Wednesday!!
Can't wait for next week to come,seriously!! hahas! It's scanning for baby boy!!
Hmmm. I'm still deciding on the name for him. And my dear mother who's his grandmother will be thinking for his Chinese name. hahas.
Time is zooming so fast lar!! It's coming to the end of Nov.
Seriously speaking, I'm really looking forward to baby boy's arrival yet abit of nervous in me.
haha! Wondering under what kind of situation I'll be going for my labour.. As every one experience different kinds of situation..
And i really wished to go for natural birth without and pain relief..
But..
I can't expect or hope much.. We may not know the situation during labour be like.. hahas!
The best is not to hope much,if not you will be highly disappointed when what you hope for can't be the fact that you want it this way.. (:
Hope baby boy will just cooperate with me..

Tell you something..
I'm starting to get stretch marks on my tummy. (:
But it's not that much though. so.. hahas.
Plus, i'm getting lazy and lazy each day..
Oh my god!! hahas. how can this be.. lols!
Got to start packing my room to welcome baby boy's arrival..
hahas! and getting ready for mother-hood!! (:(:

World of Twenties!

2009-11-01T20:15:00.003+08:00

OMG! Can't believe that in an few hours time, I'm going to step into the world of Twenties!
That's how time flies!
OLD OLD OLD LIAO!! ):
Had a pre-advanced birthday celebration with cliques. *cheers*
Thank loads to Chiuling and Chester for the dinner treat! Apologies to them also for rushing off so suddenly..
Received quite a few hong baos from my family members.. Quite a sum of money eh. Well, all this money i decided to put one side and save it for big daddy!! *Shh!*
Sort of looking forward tmr,not only bcos my bdae.. But bcos it's the first time dear will be FREE to celebrate together with me!!! After so many years,like finally!!
Past few years, there's so much things that won't able to celebrate together,and it's either celebrating beforehand..
Therefore, I'm wondering what dear is planning for me. But i know i can't expect too much bcos...
He's asking me where i want to go!!! Arghh! He still dare to tell me he wanted to bring me to zoo and Singapore flyer.. When I'm expecting,he wants to bring me to such places i longed to go for years already!! Knowing that at this state of me,how do i get to enjoy myself totally?? Cos' i know that if i go.. I know that i'll be tired halfway!!
But I really feel like going Zoo,Night Safari, Singapore Flyer and Marina Barrage. There's still 1 more lar.but i know he always reject this!! Neo-prints!!
Ahh!!
After my bdae, will be looking forward to baby prince's arrival!!! *nervous*
Yeah, coming Friday will be my appointment. always so looking forward! (:
Okay lar,writting till here.
Waiting for dear to come back home.Can't wait for him to fly back here asap! (:

PS: I think i should get an eye checkup asap!

2009-10-14T21:15:00.003+08:00

I going to get myself a new camera!
ARGHH!
I hate when my brother always taking my things without asking my permission!!!
Daddy brought a sony camera for my bdae gift..
Now,my brother is always using it now and then as and when he like!!
I super dislike my mother's action! Always siding him!!!
stupid! cant' believe i've such brother.. ):

2009-10-14T16:02:00.002+08:00

Home Sweet Home! (:
Went over to hubby's place on Sunday straight after work.
Sunday
Last day over at Thomson, treated them pizza hut.. *Cheers! Frankly speaking, i prefer to work at Thomson rather than Great world city.. hahas.. Perhaps it's more fun over there.. Worked til 7 then went back home to prepare my things to go over hubby's place.. Brought my laptop along.. Cos his laptop was spoiled.. cannot switched on at all. lols. Cabbed down to gwc then straight to bi's place.
reached home exactly at 10pm. (: Watched 家好月圆 at PPS. watched halfway fell asleep le.. But bi continued watching until 1plus going 2am. >.<
Monday
Lurfes having 2 days off. waked up at ard 9am plus.. He's still in his dreamland. hahas. I just don't care lar.. kept disturbing him to wake him up.. went to market to hab breakfast. ate nasilemak, after eating bi went to buy 4D. Home sweet home. Awhile later,went to heartland mall to shop around.. Brought a CD for lil prince to listen.. (: "PIANO 101" Nothing much though, brought Yoshinoya and Bubble tea for lunch back home.. Yam ice blended totally sux.. ): swear i'll not get it again!! Mama cooked dinner,so we didnt went out for dinner.. hahas. Only then i realised i had rice for 3 meals. OMG! My weight will increasing super high! LOLS! As usual lor, watched the HK drama at PPS. This time round, i fell asleep quite fast. too tired le ba.. And i told bi that i feel like having 肉骨茶 for breakfast tmr. He say okay, wait for his mummy to bring his brother to sch then we'll go tgt.. We shall see then.. =X
Tuesday
I woke up ard 6plus going 7.. Guess what? Bi still sleeping soundly like a cow. Lols. So i went back to sleep knowing that there is no chance le. hahas. Guess what? By the time he woke up is 1030am le!! Mama say "去，还说要去。。" I was laughing at bi when Mama say this to him.. sigh. so he went to order pizza hut online lor. arghh.. Has been eating pizza often recently..After eating i went to watch the show again..Gonna finish the show soon. hahas. Well,the ending was nice and touching. Unlike some,you got to figure out yourself the endings,stupid endings i called. After watching, i packed my things.. Go back home lo!(: Took train to chinatown to buy my lunch. My Fav yong tau foo! Also KOI's Peach Green tea with the mini pearls.. Also brought baukua back home..
Mummy was doing sushi for dinner.. Was wondering if the turn-out was nice not.. so i asked bi to eat first.. Who knows.. "Not bad" This was what he say after eating.. hahas. *thumbs up to mummy lor. Finally she get to do it le. She has been doing for a few times,and it turns out to be failure.. Didn't went over to grandma's place cos nobody is going over. ): Have not been seeing my cousins for 3 weeks plus.. Bi turned in quite early eh.. He lay on the bed at 10pm. But i'm not sleepy le.. hahas. so i let him sleep lor..so i turned in at abt 10plus..
Wednesday
Mummy brought breakfast for us.. woke up at 845am. Bi got to prepare to go for work.. arghh. Well, i did nothing much today.. Eating, sleeping, watching tv.. that's all..hahas.
And..i'm craving alot of different kinds of food now.. Such as 肉骨茶, wanna go New York New York and mashed potato lea. omg!!
Anyway,i've been staying at home for 3 days without going anywhere and doing anything. Planned to wake up early every morning to hab breakfast with mummy. Shall make it happen and not to be lazy.. ): Okay lar, i think i shall stop here..

ps: Green is good for eyes..

2009-10-10T22:20:00.003+08:00

hey everybody!
how's everyone doing? hope it is good and well.. (:
Had a new skin for my blog again.. yes, i know.. i'm always changing but seldom update..
sorry uh.. Promise to update often yeah? hahas..

Had a full 2 days rest since Friday and today..
didn't went anywhere at all.. hahas.
Had full shift on Thursday.. which was like 10am to 10pm. ):
sales wasn't that good either..
yah..so i stayed at home the whole day on Friday and Saturday..
cool isn't it?
Will be working tml.. LAST DAY!
It's like finally.. cos i told my boss i wanted to work until end of September..
and i dragged and dragged.. all the way it's mid oct already..
If i still continue working.. I guess lurfes will be unhappy.. thought he didn't say anything..
cos he's tired to say me already..
Got around 2 months before i go for my labour..so i think during this period of time, i hope i'm not that lazy to go out and take a walk.. If not,during labour would be slightly hard for me.. so i had some plans in my mind which i hope i would be able to do it. Swimming might be the best during this period of time. Especially the time when we were going to give birth.. Hope that i would do more exercise O.. (",)

24 more days to my 20Th Birthday!!
Oh my god, i can't believe.. Going into the world's of 20s..
People start calling me aunties.. and i can't scold or yell at them right..
soon to be mummy in few months time..
so excited yet so nervous.. =/
How time flies.. It's going to be another new year soon.
lols. Getting older another year by year..

Anyway, last wednesday went for my check-up.
Baby boy is doing well.no worries to their god-mummies.. (:
Hahas. When lurfes and me went inside the room for scanning, baby boy was facing downwards.. Yes,you would say again.. hahas. He's too shy to let us see his face.. hahas.
His weight was 1.05kg. So light huh? Ya,the doc say it's normal at this stage..
And my weight was like.. 51.1kg!! never had this weight before.. arghh. well,i'll get to lose weight after giving birth.. hahas! that's my top priority!! Lurfe's weight was even scary.. shot up to 61.3kg.. He was even sad! hahas. he say he wanna go for some exercise already.. if not he won't hab the time to get himself to the gym when baby boy is out.. All is worth when baby boy is out.. (:

Well, i guess i'm stopping here.
turning in soon.
got to work tmr in the noon.
take care everyone! (:

2009-10-05T21:00:00.002+08:00

It's been a long time since i blog eh..
hahas. sorry for the late update):
i'm doing well. same goes to baby boy..
he's getting 7 months i think.
going for checkup on this wed.. (:
so looking forward to see him this wednesday..
yupp.
and i still haven think of any names.. gosh.
time flies..
just 2 more months..so looking foward lar..

erm,waiting for silly boy to end work ):
hahas. shld i get a i touch?
just a random thought..

2009-09-15T22:12:00.002+08:00

almost quarreling every night..
why is this so?
can someone just tell me why..
i guessed i shall shut my mouth always..
a lil things to joke to make the days better..it seems so hard..
k den.
i shall sleep with my tears tonight.
i wont give you much trouble.
nights everyone.

2009-08-24T23:03:00.002+08:00

hey peeps.
Aha! I know that my blog has been dead for a period of time.
Sorry about that. Has been busy running here and there..preparing my wedding preparations.
Yeah, guessed that at this point of time..many friends have already knew the news about me getting married eh? And also, waiting for baby prince's arrival by end of this year.. (:
Super excited.. I guessed that's how mummy-to-be feel when they are waiting for their baby's arrival, isn't it?

Had a hard time searching for a new skin.. then editing here and there..
Got to thank wei xin for the help,if not i guessed I'll be struggling with it until don't know what time.. Thanx girl.. (:

Well, i shall update more tml..
shall turn in now to get some rest.. hahas.
Night everyone! (:

2009-07-12T23:24:00.008+08:00

Do all girls like their boyfriend to give them 100% freedom totally?

All here is just how i feel and what i've think.
So no offence.
-I guess for me, i would like my boy to give certain limit. not totally 100% freedom at all.. Cos i would feel very insecure. Why? 100 % freedom.. for me..it's like you don't care much abt me.. ):
Well, i guess all girls do like surprises.. Oh well, i know that you wont do this kind of things. I don't blame you at all. Someone asked me.. did i ever received any flowers from the opposite sex? My answer was no.. fake flowers from my childhood friends (magdeline, jane). Till now, i still display it on my table. Flowers were a waste of money. Okay. i know it and i accept it without any grumble. Not even once a blue moon.Or maybe when i'm unhappy, you can do something to cheer me up. DIY..Not a must for you to buy flowers.. but.. when i'm always hinting you, you would say the grass along the side of the road. It's not the flower issue,u see.. just that i feel when i'm down. what did you ever do to cheer me up? a simple DIY that u've done..anything it can be.. sigh. Am i asking too much?
Gals will always do some DIY stuff.. like cross stitching,folding stars or heart. all sorts of stuff lar.. U will ask me not to do such things..dun waste ur time..bla bla and so on.. celebrating anniversary was nothing to you.. What's the point of celebrating right? You may think.. a msg like happy anniversary.. is alr more than enough or rather i should say i'm really happy. You said, you were being forced.
To put it this way, if i'm out.. i wished that somehow or in someway, you would wait for me to reach home then you would turn in. But if let's say..you are really dead tired, i don't blame you. You told me that you don't like to msg to disturb me when i'm with my friends.. but one or two msg..i think it's not that demanding right? Is not that every min every now and then you are calling or text-ing me right.. that want is what you mean "disturb". Nope. no messages from you until when i reached home, u said this " i going to sleep, becareful lo." how would any girls react or feel?
Maybe to some gals they would think i'm asking for too much or i'm too demanding... Certain times when i'm working.. You will having off day,so u would be at home. When i end work, yes, i would text you and say i end work. How i wished you would called me by accompany-ing me on the phone while i'm on my way home.Just like i accompanied you on the phone while you was waiting for bus back home. Maybe you would said: "i never asked you to call,you can make ur decision. You can say no to it." It's normal i would called to accompany you on the phone even though i already know that you don't need me to accompany you on the phone. sigh. Well,how i wished ur no will be flashing each time when i ended work making my way back home.
And to realise something silly.. which is.. I'm always the one taking the first step to go which place here and there.. always asking you, so where you wanna go on your off day. to think back, did you ever tried not to ask me anything and bring me to somewhere.. As you know, wherever i go, as long as you are with me.I'm fine with it.
Perhaps, i shld stop all this nonsense.. just in case,one fine day you would think i'm asking or rather expecting too much..

Asking me to let it go, looking for another one that suits what i want..
It hurts alot.
Letting go was never easy for anyone.
"Don't put too much heart in it" This was what you told me.. You think i can control my feelings? oh well,
I never blame you for being like this.. i take it, i accept it..
I would never regret the path that i've taken..
Cos once i've put my heart and soul in it..,i will never give up so easily..
I'll still continue walking..

Don't hope for hope

2009-07-10T16:02:00.003+08:00

It's 4.06pm now.
I was so happily looking forward to friday which is today.. as my silly boy will be coming out today.. Finally finished his re-service. (:
It's a good thing, anyway.
It's hard to predict exactly what time he can step out of the place.. plus, he hab to turn back home to do his laundry and stuff in order to meet me..
By the time.. i guess.. i'm half tired already.. plus i'm working tml full shift. ):
Actually, i'm supposed to meet him for dinner last sat. but due to some problems, we can't.
Equals to disappointment! ):
Now i don't feel so much disappointed lar.. cos i alr told myself not to hope for high hopes.. in case, anything crop up again..

Ytd met up with Jia Yun that silly girl for soup spoon at bugis.
Hahas. haven seen her for a very long time already.. lols. She's always busy working..
After soup spoon, walked down to art fren to look ard.. then headed to tcc for a coffee.
lols. And you know what? I drank a mocha choc, i couldnt sleep for the night totally!!!! ): oh my god!!
Hope to meet her up soon again. Provided that the both of us are free... smiles.

take care peers! (:

2009-06-26T21:55:00.007+08:00

It's been a long time since i update eh.
hahas.

Went swimming this afternoon alone..
guessed what.. i met pegan at the washroom.. lols.
after that,headed down to taka to meet silly to have lunch with him..
poor him): hab to work this 3 days at taka.. nvm. tml is last day le..
sun will be his off day, but i'm working lar! ): arghh. following which, the next day he'll be going for his reservice for 2 weeks! ahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!

the neo-print that was taken 2 years ago.. hahas..
Erm.. don't know when shall be the next time we'll be taking..
i always ask him this..

me: when we taking neo-print again ah?

him: NO! ):

don't know when lor.. sigh. nvm lar..

Our A&W Drink.. went to msia last tue..
with my family.. and silly came along too (:
It was abit rush for him lar.. rushed all the way down to my house after his work..
cos uncle's driving us back home (",)

Aha! Our meal and our shopping bags..
Their burger was like... super small lo..
Well, just enough for me.. but i guessed for him... hmmm..
not enough de lar..

Nice? With his thick thick-long hair.. lols.
But.. he's going for re-service on mon..):
for like 2 weeks..
He bought this at holiday plaza..
don't know why he has the urge to buy this monkey printed shirt.. he also bought 2 short pants wor..

Taken at thomson plaza.. while working..
hahas.
with jing jing, yupar, titi and my god-daughter amelia.. cheers!

2009-06-10T21:59:00.007+08:00

Am i so unlucky recently?!
Bad things just come one after another. sigh.
Went to meet ♥ on Mon for breakfast at heartland mall.
with 8 hours of sleep, i was really sleepy and tired. lols.
Still, i managed to get myself there on time for breakfast with him. (",)
Had Mac breakfast. ♥ ate a meal and ordered extra hot cakes.. powerful eater right?
lols. I was already super full after eating my burger plus a harsh brown and a medium ice Milo.
Went to his house, his room was super messy. I guessed my room is much more worst than him. I decided to re-arrange his wardrobe.. While packing halfway, his army helmet dropped on my TOE!!
SUPER DUPER PAIN LAR!!
It looked so swollen now.. and it's also so purple in color.
I wondered when it will recovered...
♥ finally got his PSP SLIM..
BUT, not the color he wanted.. lols.

stomach is feeling so undigested..
must be the sambal's fault..
arghh. feel like drinking Yakut. i love green flavour. *hint hint*
hais.. ): feeling so blue.. is it so hard to understand.. *pouts*
nvm, i'll just numb myself by doing loads of work tmr at thomson ba.

is it so hard to find a person who treats me well?

2009-06-08T00:18:00.003+08:00

Finally done with my blogskin. (: hope it's nice.. had a hard time looking for what i really wants..
Going to my wonderland soon, i guess.. hab to wake up early tmr to meet ♥ for breakfast!!!
Yes, working tmr.. ): lucky it's only night shift.
But the next few days..i wonder how it will be..
Tue will be working full at gwc.. Wed and Fri working at Thomson P.

Recently,i guess i've fall in love wit Thomson P. I prefer working there rather than gwc.. though ♥ is working at gwc.. Perhaps working at Thomson P, time passes faster.. hahas.
Gosh. And I only get a day rest on Thursday..

OH YA! And i almost forgot that i've a date with Magdeline on Thursday. Tanning session..

Whoos! Lucky, many times we had already put one another aeroplane.. Hope this time round, it'll be a successful want. *pray hards
Who cares):
Anw, i've got my pay.. (:(: *very on time this month...

I shall upload a picture each time i update my post here..
To make it more nicer? lols.
Okays, i guess i shall hab to stop here then!

Goodnight everyone!

2009-06-01T22:03:00.004+08:00

hey peeps!
I'm back with old pictures again. hahas.

Maurice's Bdae! (:
Full length of people! "We are happy family! "

The gals in our Class 5B!
Claire, Priscilla, Pegan, Me, Sharon, Rachel, MingYing, Li Wen, Kelly and Hanisah*
Not forgetting farhana.. smiles!

Teacher's Day 2008. Went back to visit Mr Lim, our math teacher.

hahas. He taught me math since sec 3.

He taught my bro A & E math since sec 3 too. (:

And..i met xiu hui at sch's canteen.. cheers!

Together with Eric Loh.

Our Fun Shot with Mrs Anthony..

It's the lively us! lols.

2 years ago. We were practicing our aces dance for teacher's day..

Well.. taken with wei xin, kit yee, shanny, you ling and may jun.. (:

Left to Right: Wei xin, kit yee, you ling and me

Taken at East Coast park Mac.. After cycling.. whoo.. tired faces!

Sun tec's Mac with dear xin..

Hmmm.. i got no idea where this photo was taken exactly.. seriously..
hahas..

ps: pictures were very random.. heh..

It's the month of june luhs..

Playing pets right now.. silly told me that he's going to overtake me soon..

omg!! nvm.

i guess he must be sleeping right now.. so i using this good time to chase.. hahas..

weather's very hot recently.. do drink loads of water yeah?

take care!! (:

2009-05-25T22:45:00.002+08:00

those were the days in qtss.. hmmm.. when i was having my braces.
>.<
look so .... hmmm..
missed those wonderful days back then..

anyway,my health is getting better now.
My weight has turned to 42kg luhs! (:
working tml, friday,sat and sun..
oh my god!!
start saving money!!! (:

2009-05-07T20:29:00.002+08:00

I'm back.
so sorry for the late updating..
I"m down with sickness lately..
Had no appetite since last sat,
so i went to visit a Chinese doc on Monday with mummy..
was getting well on wed.. when silly came over to my place on tue night to acc me.
hees. who knows..
my fever came along wed night...
I couldn't attend my graduation on Thursday morning.
so disappointed lar!
sigh.
38.2 *wad do u think?
lols. i went to see my nearby doc this morning.
the doc was super afraid of me luhs..
doc: where's your mask?
me: the nurse didnt give me the mask. ):
i had to use the back entrance lo. that was super pathetic can..
sigh.
almost sick for a week.. i do missed alot of good food, you know?!
omg! esp the advertisement for the pizza hut..
sads!!
anyway take care everyone yeah!

2009-04-21T23:57:00.001+08:00

hello,i'm back again.
sian.
i hate the connection lor.
disconnect at the wrong timing!
pets society is super lagging!!
arghh.
worst,
i may create a volcano..
sigh..
he is hot and cold..

2009-04-21T22:48:00.002+08:00

Has been working for the past 2 days at thomson.
*Tired*
more work there compared to gwc. arghh
Busy crowd..i'll tend to forget certain people's order.
Compared to the first time when i came in, i'm much more better now okay..
cannot blame me also.. customer should order at the cashier and pay there..
It's even stated there >.<
the customer didnt go to the cashier there and he sat down there.
just so nice i was serving food,and he just order "kopi kopi " like that.
Hello, it's a cafe not a "kopitam" whereby you just kopi kopi..
diao.. hahas. and now i love doing waffle.
so proud of it lar..
dots.

Finally, a rest day tmr.
edison's show is alr out!!
alemak.
wonder how's is the show like..
silly is off tmr..
hmm..guess he's too tired to go anywhere also..
ask me to rest at home lor. *.*

Genting Trip 14 April - 17 April (:

2009-04-19T16:47:00.043+08:00

Day 1

On our way luh.. (:

He is trying my shades..

trying to act cool right.. heh. and looked abit fat hor..

candid shot(:

Day 2

i just woke up..

my breakfast: roti prata

enjoying his teh..

drink my coconut.. looked very greedy eh?

Theme Park

i loved the dino's reaction..

The hotel where we stayed..

up above the hill (",)

the weather was like this after we stepped into the theme park..

Was waiting fer the car racing game.. arghh. stil got to register.. diao..

Presenting to you the game.. hahas..

brrr.. it's getting colder already..

energizer lea..

boating..

life jackets..

i looked so fat and uglyyyyyyyyy!! so unglam! ):

i loved this picture seriously!! look at his smile!! <3!

tired!

Hmm..for your information.. i was forced to play this spinning car ride.. lol.

Though it's for kids.. i feel so giddy after playing.. hahas. but alright..

I'm hungry le.. so marrybrown was our choice ! hee.

While heading to the cable-car.. i saw this giant poster.. wana take and shall show it to my mum.. It's my mum fav idol. fei yu qing.

He asked why i didnt take picture inside the cable car..

can't you see my face looked so terrible..

i don't even dare to move ard not to mention my hand..

*Faints* For those who are afraid of height.. like me.. my legs has turned jelly..

lol. stil got a long way before i reached down there.. 3.4km..

But overall okay ba.. hahas. must take more.. so that i'll be able to take the ride again with silly.

Silly take de lor.. This was heading back to our hotel..

Reaching soon.. wahahahs..

I didnt take any pictures on day 3. hahas.. was just shopped and shopped. hahas. .

Day 4

My breakfast: mee rebus

Very big plate.. =X was shocked when they served us.

It's nice!!

Okays, silly's having wanton noodle.. their noodle was very special.. nice!

Hmmm ... *pout*

I taking 5 stars bus?? hahas..

Manicure done over there at Day 3.

45 RM. not bad hur.. massage my hands... (:(:

"I'm going back spore liao" hope to be back soon! (:

The bus behind was the company we took. silly with all our shopping bag and stuffs.

2009-04-18T23:26:00.001+08:00

okay, i'm done with my skin.
sweet and simple.
hahas.
anyway,i'm back from genting.
lols.
shall update more when i'm back..
gonna log in to facebook to play my pet.
see ya! (:

2009-04-18T21:25:00.000+08:00

looking for new skins..
recommendation anyone??
i'm sick of this skin le.
looked so down.. ):

为什么越来越爱一个人,却觉得越来越寂寞.

2009-04-04T23:22:00.002+08:00

Exactly 1 week. The day you've left us.
April Fool's Day was the last day,
and it was the very last time i could see you again.
sigh ):
Saying goodbye was the hardest part.
I can't control my tears that day, i told myself to be strong abt it when i'm over there.
Finally, i get to understand the feeling of losing your love oness.
How hard it is for us to accept it or not.
to accept the days without having him/her around..
It was my first trip to the mandai.. where they burned the coffin and the body..
how hurtful to see such sitiuation.. saying goodbye to someone dearly..
i totally breakdown when it's going in.. all the thoughts/memories started rolling in my mind..
yah, it was my first time going through this..
in the past, perhaps i was still young to know all this..
I miss you dearly..

Am i alright today?
It seems that i'm crazy at work today..
To think back, perhaps onli a small group of people would know that the more crazy i get.. it means that something is bothering me somehow?
I got no idea abt it too. ):
Anyway, i got a surprise from luke gor. (:
i know it's kinder troublesome for you to come down from ur house to here.
no straight bus ma.. right? hee.
The last time i met him was last year may.. -.-
almost one year.. hahas. had a great chat with him..
i would always tell him alot of things.. and i'll be like talking non-stop once i met him..
And,guess what he told me??
He said i shrink alot and getting more smaller.. >.<
description was powerful lar. wth.
AH, whatever..
I love ur presence, kor! (:
thanx alot for not forgetting this mei all this 5 years down the road..
*much appreciated!! gees..

too late for regrets now

2009-03-29T22:23:00.007+08:00

FEILUNHAI'S AUTOGRAPH SESSION was very successful today.
i reached there at 7am and queued with pegan, hui yan and some of the fren's fren..
yaya..so many link hur..
candy joined me too.. (:
8 hours of waiting.. was totally worth i can say..
Just before they arrived, the weather was so hot that it could kill everyone.
When they reached and sang a song..it started to rain heavily..
I stood there and continue waving with them. *lol* how hard-core i'm like..
not like others..who run to avoid the rain.
Seeing their performance, i felt that all the waiting was worth!! (:
taking pictures all i can.. there's 1 picture that i loved the most.
it was calvin.
yes, i know. some of you out there who knows i love wu zun so much would be wondering how on earth i would be taking calvin's picture..
I tried my very best to taking wu zun's picture and ya lun..
but i couldn't manage to.. cos ya lun's view was always blocked by the fans up there...
i manage to take calvin's picture.. reason was he was the first person you'll get to see on stage..
i guess many people would loved that picture to hell.
I SWEAR!
It doesn't take long to get their signature.
i manage to get it within 45 mins?
ya.. how fast it is.. after all the hard work has been paid.
When i was on the stage, we had a chance to shake their hand.
Thus, when it was my turn
calvin: xie xie ni wor *shaking hand
me: xie xie, JIA YOU *with a smile
Aaron: xie xie
me: same, xie xie plus a JIA YOU *of cos with a smile.
JIRO: xie xie ni
me: xie xie, JIA YOU * with a smile too.
JIRO: he was looking at me and his expression was like staring at you..
me: for that very moment..,i was like hur..
lols. for that min.. candy was behind me.. she saw it too!!
WU ZUN: xie xie ni!
me: bu ke qi! jia you wor!
I felt so happy after the autograph session.
TOTALLY HAPPY!

When i reached home..
I received a bad news from mummy.
"ah mu" has just passed away.
when i've heard this news, all i wanted was to rush down there.
What's my relationship between her and me?
She was once my grandma's neighbour.
Indeed it was more than a neighbour..
she's more like a relative to me.
a very very close want, i should say..
As you know, my grandma has moved since last year august..
Grandma had stayed there for like 30 going 40 years over there..
I was born at my grandma's house.
which means, she has looked after me ever since i was born
i was like a grand-daughter to her.
the last day when we all went to grandma's house, she asked us to visit her more often.
i told her i will..
but everything was too late..
TOO LATE!
i told myself i'll go down and visit her when i'm free..
and it always seems that i'm not doing so..
Just when i had finished my final term, i told myself that i would definitely go down and visit her more often than i should.
sigh.. everything's too late to regret at this point of time..
i feel so bad! seriously, i promised her that i would visit her after we had moved..
Yet, all i gave her was empty promises..
I really shouldn't have done that..
i didn't expect the next time when i visiting her will be this kind of situation..
definitely, no one wants it.
I sat down quietly.Atmosphere ard us were totally down..
all my aunts' eyes were red and teary..
including my grandma..
She went to one side and one of the old neighbours were talking to her.
I was controlling my tears..
I told myself i had to be strong..
I've to put a strong act in front of my relatives.
If i don't,i guess everyone will be crying.
Many times, my tears were rolling down.. but i kept looking up.
sigh. that's how terrible it was.

It all happened within a day.
In short, within 24 hours.
for the whole morning when i was looking forward to feilunhai's autograph session till i was so over-joyed after i get their signature..
And the night has turned into sadness for most of us.
I can't take this blow.
I don't know how i'm going to deal it..
sigh ):
Lucky, silly managed to talk to me on the phone.
after much crying, i guess i'm slightly better..

"Each time when i think of you, my tears aren't within my control."
I should be relief that you went peacefully..
I'll give myself some time to take it.
part of it that i couldnt take it bcos things happened so out of the blue.
I shall promise you that i'll be fine after some days.
It's a promise to you.

ps: thanx silly. (",)

sorry seems to be the hardest word.

2009-03-28T22:56:00.006+08:00

I am not angry.
neither am i unhappy over something also.
perhaps all i can blame was for being clumsy.
It's all the medicine's fault,
for making me so drowsy and clumsy.
I spilled milk tea at xiao fang in the afternoon, pour the ice at the milk tea instead of the ice tub..
dropped a tub of ice-cream on my foot.
which was so hurtful.. ):
late at night, i dropped all the pearls on the floor.
i just don't know why..
all i just wanted to take the pearls and put it all inside the cup and to start preparing for closing.
that's all. very simple.
i didn't mean anything.
But i don't know what makes you to yell at me so angrily..
not to even ask a why from you...
i cannot control my tears rolling down on my cheek..
after you left, i just squat down and cried..
i'm not unhappy or angry or anything else.
i was just bored, drowsy and feeling so unwell..
and you insisted that i was feeling upset, moody or unhappy over smth.
really nothing.

Went to visit the doctor this afternoon before i went for work.
cos my flu was still on..and my ears is always blocked..
so blocked that i'm trying my best to hear people taking with 1 of my ears..
my headache was so painful than it used to be.
I was so afraid smth bad will happen,as it's smth to do with the head..so i didn't want to put it aside and just let it heal as days goes by.
doc: wad color was ur phlegm?
me: green
doc: it's green bcos ur phlegm is full of germs.. that's why it causes ur nose and ears to be block at all times.
me: oh. okay. and what abt my headache? why do i run or bend down, it'll be so hurtful?
doc: It's all ur phlegm causes it..
me: okay, thank you.
that was it.. almost gave me a fright.. i thought smth bad will happen. lols.
i got to finished all my pills even if i've recovered..

ps: perhaps no one would understand what i am going through..
just got to remind myself to be stronger each time when i'm growing weaker..

goodnight everyone.

2009-03-19T22:20:00.003+08:00

my brother is recovering after some injection to the backside.
arghhs! tupid!
He reached home and happily smilling at me saying that he's getting well soon.
I'm like coughing my lungs out liao lo.
all thanx to him.
4 days already..
i had already lose my voice..
coughing my lungs out..
nose flooding til dun know which country already..
head is spining like a yoyo..
fever is up and down..
diao..

ps: silly boy,where are you?? can u cum over and look after me?? (:
kk lars.. just joking..
know you will stay at home and sleep like a piggg!!

2009-03-17T20:34:00.002+08:00

I hate being sick. *arghhh
it's so terrible..
i guessed i've got it from my brother..
he was having fever on and off since sunday..
):
just hate the feeling of being sick.
goodness!!
Aunt asked me if i'm interested to go shanghai with her not.
wahahas.!!
got to plan my schedule out.
hahas.
after shanghai will be genting trip with silly (:

okay,guess i've to stop here.
gonna take flu medicine and gonna have some rest.
night everyone.

2009-03-14T23:50:00.002+08:00

吃不能吃,
睡不能睡.

没有了你全都不对,
我都学不会把爱敷衍,
用笑容来把眼泪催眠.

笑不能笑,
哭不敢哭,
人不像人,
鬼不像鬼,

朋友都说这不过失恋,
但我却连呼吸都胆怯.
能不能不爱了,
因为爱太痛了
我痛得快死了
却无法把你忘了
能不能不爱了
爱情它太痛了,我痛得快死了
却无法把爱割舍...
我不能睡...我不能够不能够不爱了

----------------------------------------

why do some people dont get my intentions in the right way?
i'm only asking if eating that want is alright not.
and not another meaning behind it.
i was thinking that the fry ice-cream is unique and special.
thats all.

Finally, i'm considered graduted from CE!
after so long..
2 years, neither short or long.
afterall, so much things had happened during this 2 years of ITE.
Guessed i don't hab to type everything down right.
Maybe to some of my closer friends will know wad has happened..

2009-03-09T16:47:00.002+08:00

left with 2 papers to go..
yippee!!
my nightmare is coming to an end soon.
lols.
after exams, i'm planning to go running and swimming daily.*at least..
feeling that my fats are growing and growing..
hahas. gonna to get rid of those layers of fats..
(:
after the papers, means..
silly's birthday is coming soon..
smiles!! *cheeky eh.

alright, that's all for now.
see ya!
please pray for me.
joking anyway... (:

2009-03-07T09:53:00.005+08:00

Why do i wake up so early on saturday??
all thanx to my brother!!!
Blasting his music so loud that i can even hear it from my lala land..
*shucks*
I dreamt of him-yisheng.
How strange it can be right?
lols. Perhaps it's been such a long long years i've someone who is good to me.
yes, i do long for that feeling once again.
definitely, not him again.
cheers! (: all ended well!

Anyway,i had taken out my extension.
my right ear had infected, i supposed to?
I prayed hard that my old illness wont be back..
exams is coming so fast.
Really dislike the atmosphere at the sports halll.
sigh!so afraid.
Well, got to get some rest first.
working in the noon.

ps: the sky is getting dark..

never stop working hard

2009-03-04T20:52:00.006+08:00

so sorry for the late update.
another week has past. and i'm just left with 1 week. ):
exams come and goes in an blink of eye..
I can't believed that 2 years in ITE has coming an end soon.
REAL SOON.

Okay, Monday went to extend my hair with candy.
i looked so weird with long hair lar... *this is how i think..
Going to bear with this long hair for months.. arghhh..
*think of the positive side*
Yesterday went to baby dillion house.
Has not been visiting him for the past 1 week.
He's having cough and flu, aunt reminded me not to bring and cookies and sweets for him.
So, i brought him just a bag and a soft toy ball with thomas and friends printed on it.
Headed home around 8plus..guess who I've met at the train?
It's my brother! Not the one i'm facing everyday..
It's my tang-ge jia hao..hahas. i would always named him ge-ge..
went to tiong to meet silly.pass him his umbrella.

Headed down to sch in the morning wit candy, squeezing the train with people..
When we reached tamp,we got to wait for hui qi..
*piang* that moment, how i wished that i'm still sleeping on my bed with my eeyores!
No choice, had to stroll ard there for 3 hours. cos our next lesson starts at 1pm.
Candy keeps complaining that she spend alot of money because of me.. *.*
Diao..
Okays, shall pray hard that i got a job soon.
Waiting for Priscilla's good news wor..

OMG!and i saw yu le bai fen bai this evening.
Wu Chun injured his leg..hope he get well soon!

had a short conversation with mummy through msn.. thanx mummy for the advise and ur ears after all this years..
your advise and everything is all i always wanted..
and whenever you tell me.. i would always feel comfortable..
how i miss those days..
i do appreciate you, mummy.
i love you, mum!

2009-02-23T22:33:00.002+08:00

Just wished that the rain would washed away all the troubles i've in mind..
):
time is running..
2 more weeks to my final paper..
omg!

well, i just need a few mins of ur time to talk to..
it seemed to be so hard.
sigh.

2009-02-19T11:27:00.002+08:00

hello peeps!
aha!it's been a long time since i've updated..
so how's everyone doing?
lols.
went swimming yesterday.
oh ya, cia if you happen to see this here..
this coming sunday, are you free??
i meeting cheryl for tanning session..
exam is coming soon.
lols.
so bored..
getting more lazy to go to sch each day.
anyway,got to go.
sch's comp is so laggggggg..........

take care! (:

2009-02-12T20:22:00.002+08:00

not feeling well.
must be the lasi lemak, tom yam noodles and a can of coke that i had in the afternoon.
i've learnt my lesson. ):
sigh.
exams is coming ard the corner.
as each day goes, it's getting nearer and nearer..
omg.

ps: i feel that the distant is getting further away. ):

2009-02-07T23:46:00.002+08:00

super depressed right now..
Had a reunion dinner at my relative's place just now.
maybe, to some of my frens, you may know that i've a god grandpa.
as my uncle was adopted by him since he was young.
Thus, he's also like a grandpa to me ever since i'm born.
Seeing him in this state now, my heart breaks alot.
It hurts even totally when he asked my mum who i'm..
he can't recognise me now..
It's totally heart-breaking.
There were so many questions of "what if" in my mind..
such as..
"what if" he's lost on the way from place to another place.
"what if" he can't remember..
"what if" someone out there knowing his situation now and taking advantage of him.
"what if" something happenes to him, or maybe he needs our help and we can't be there..
I can't imagine the days without him.
sigh.

I found myself with alot of injuries and bruises.

You are the missing piece i need...
but..

2009-02-02T13:37:00.002+08:00

Brother just started sch today..
He woke up at 6am this morning..
super early huh?
hahas. hope he has a good day over there..
well, he's posted to JJC.
hope he wont change his mind again.. lols.

hahas.
feel like going for a swim or tanning.
wanting to get my body abit more tan.
ahas!
it's been a long time since i tanned myself.
my skin's calling! =P

anyway, got to go.
see ya!
take cares!!

2009-02-01T15:27:00.008+08:00

你说的话在我心中生了根
爱得很深所以心很疼
记忆在我的心中翻滚
是不是每一个人
都像我一样笨
只怕再问对彼此都太残忍
我能感觉另外一个人
我等等笑容换成泪痕
爱在崩溃的时候比较真

太多疑问知道答案又如何
原来容忍不需要天份
只要爱错一个人
心痛比快乐更真实
爱为何这样的讽刺
我忘了这是第几次
一见你就无法坚持
孤独比拥抱更真实

爱让人失去了理智
会不会是我太自私
拒绝更寂寞的日子
放不开也看不见未来
难道这种不完美
才是爱情真实的样子

sigh.
so heart-aching.
sometimes, i shld not hab see things that i physically don't want to see..
because,at least it wont make me feel so sad.
well.,it's all fated to be. 0.o
feel so helpless right now....
what am i suppose to do?
all i wish..
is just a person to be there with in need of times, be it ups and downs.
it seems that hard for me.
ever since sec sch days.
now,
i hab no choice but to believe my fate.
this is my fate.

ps: no worries. i'm just grumbling.. i'll be fine after some writting.
lols.

wanna go sentosa to view the flowers over there..
last year, mummy and my aunties went there..
the flowers were beautiful.
sigh.
how i wish...

2009-01-22T21:02:00.002+08:00

bored to death.
how i wish i could do nothing at all.
lol!
if only..
you were mine..
once again..
miracles..
*wishing*
wipe away all the tears you had..
no more unhappiness for you..

can you hear me?
if you can..
please grant me eh,
(;

anyway, new year is coming..
godness.

i need someone to talk to!!!
well, nothing much though..
i'm thinking to continue working not.
the thoughts of working almost everyday is so sick.
i just want a fixed sat..
arghh!!
i don't wan to work so much!!
seriously, help me!!!!

2009-01-15T16:29:00.002+08:00

I woke up at 6am today just for a 2.4km test.
Yet, my teacher failed me!
Never in my life, i met a teacher who is so that bloody kuku lo..
Any idea how she time us? she use the timing minus the time she started..
TELL ME HOW ON EARTH ITS GOING TO BE ACCURATELY?!
super angry lar..arghh.
anyway, after that went to tampiness shopped ard.
got a pair of shoes at monda for $19.90 and a bag from cotton on for $19.95.
hahas!like after sooo long..

这里的景色叫做曾经爱过
曾存在你的拥抱和温柔
撕开票根独自重游
票价是想念你的痛

你说做朋友并不是朋友
我们比路人还陌生得多
感情的废墟重建以后
谁会偶尔回来走走

我站在回忆的入口
搜集我左胸口暴走的寂寞
赤裸裸的失落一目了然的痛
让我无法说泪是因为吹风
我沿着命运的箭头
无奈向前走到下个人的怀中
爱你还没爱够你却要我放手
谁懂在时间的秘密花园中你从没走

我说的爱你说的太自由
自由到彷佛我只是说说
未来的风景我没爱过
我只想念你的所有

我的爱你想你都以极速向回忆暴冲
他们能看见的是虚伪的从容