Rebecca & Candy should know what has happened to me recently..

family issues..

I don't understand why my mother is so biased that she doesn't know right or wrong.

All she say was my fault.

My feeling were numb for so many years already.

Ever since from young, my brother will always like to use my stuff without my permission. And when i get angry, my mom will say why are you so self-fish. i was like -.- Is not that issue. Doesn't school teach everyone to ask for permission when you need something?

My 18th Bdae, my dad gave me a sony camera for my bdae gift, i even top up 2oo bucks for it!

After 1 year, HE took it and use it without my permission and when i need the camera, i start to look like mad!! I hate pple who doesn't inform me and the feeling of looking your item high and low is totally sux, okay? Nobody on earth will like that feeling!!

So, last year hubby brought me a camera. Okay, this time round he didn't touch that camera.

There were many items my brother just took it without asking.

-my camera.

-my laptop become his gaming.

-brought a m)phosis pencil case to put my shampoo whenever i come back here. so when i put the shampoo in the bathroom, i forget to keep the case. the next day when i look for it, it's missing.

-Mingfu brought me a ipod charger that can charge using the main switch instead of the comp. then? become his items already.

-my perfume which i brought together with jiayun, is now in his room.

Perhaps there were more, just that i couldn't remembered it for now.

After O levels, my aunt accompany my mum to look for laptop bcos i kept saying that i want a laptop in case ITE needs. Not long after i brought the laptop, he started to use it, starting to download his gaming all inside which make the laptop so lag!! I was so fed-up! So, my last year in ITE, i brought a laptop during march bcos i doesn't want my brother to use. Is not that i don't want to share with him. Is just that he downloads all his dota game and whatever game it is.. And the whole lap-top become so lag, will you feel fruasted?

Few months back, he ask me if i can lend him the laptop for his project work. He say bcos his want is lag and he doesnt want his peers to know the games. -.-

Now, he uses it for his tuition. So, now my laptop got 3 account! Out of the 3, 2 is his!

So that day i was so angry that i posted something on my facebook. with this ( _|_ ) he complained to my mom.

Now, my mom said me..

mom: you want all of us to be unhappy is it?

mom: point middle finger is wrong, you know.

mom: he's your only brother, why must you like that. you were wrong, you know.

ME: YA LA, YA LA. WHATEVER HE DOES IS RIGHT, WHATEVER I DO IS WRONG ONE LA.

mom: I'm not saying whatever you do is wrong, why you always say i stand for him.

Me: Doesn't it show so obvious? LOOK AT THE WAY YOU REPLY TO HIS TALK, AND LOOK AT HOW YOU TALK TO ME?

whenever i ask my mom things or what, she always speaks like she is scolding me..

AND WHATEVER MY BROTHER TALKS TO HER, SHE WILL SPEAK TO HIM LIKE HER BOYFRIEND LIKE THAT. SOFT AND ALWAYS DON'T DARE TO TALK BACK!

Even when Mingfu and i were not married yet, he already can see that.

I can tolerate all this when i'm young. BUT NOT FOR NOW AND IN FUTURE. SERIOUSLY! WHO ON EARTH CAN TAKE IT?

My own house, have a bath-tub. it's like a spa.

In the past, my brother will use it everyday bcos he wanted to see if his face will get better after using it.

okay, he use.

Now, my foot has infected with fungus. so i wanted to try it and see how.

Each time i use, any idea what he'll say?

HE: hui xian spa again ah? ONLY KNOW HOW TO WASTE WATER ONLY.

wow! in the past, he can use it everyday not waste of water la. i use once a week, it called waste of water.

Then he uses the air con every night he sleep is what? Not waste of electricity ar?

After i tag that comment, he finally speaks his true words.

HE: So young give birth already so throw face already, stil wan tag that comment. no manners.

When i tell rebecca about this, her reaction was also that word. I didnt say that word but onli show the drawing.

Now my mom say she's going to buy a new one for him..

can any one tell me is she biased not?

he doesn't have his laptop meh? he alr have 1 big lap-top, 1 small lap-top. stil not enough. see. now they are outside buying another new one.

Few years ago, when i was in secondary school, brother and i had a fight, of cos, mom side him. Dad scolded my brother, then he say he wanted to leave home.. He did went out of the house, but my mom went out to search for him. After that incident, my dad and him doesnt speak to 1 another..

Now, my mom say it's my fault.

I was thinking. It's not totally my fault. Who to blame?

BLAME THE ONE WHO SPOILED HER SON.

isn't it?

I'm too tired! I'm glad or rather happy i gave birth to jayden at a young age.

Because staying at this house will only make me even more unhappy.

And know what, in between the arguments, my mom brought up about looking after jayden.

If looking after jayden makes her spends less time with her son, i won't mind dont coming back every week!

I wish i had rebecca and candy the cliques to meet up and talk about face to face.

Because i've hold my tears ever since yesterday..

I'm afraid i may break down anytime..

Why do i have a mom like this?

Why is it guys are much more important than womans?

So what if my brother's education is higher than me?

I hate it. I really hate to have a brother like this, a mom who always side her son, talk to her daughter like she's going to scold her or what.. But when talking to her son, she will be like his gf..

If can, i wish i wont have a mother and a brother like them.

Though i know many things happened for a reason. That doesn't mean i have to tolerate all this. I'm not borned to tolerate all this. Perhaps i'm born to be treated this way.

在我影像之中，我永远都记得你对弟弟的好，你给他的爱。永远都是你的第一位。

我好像都没有快乐的童年，所以将来我一定会给义恩一个很快乐的童年。

if i have a daughter in future, i will treat them equally. Yes. i'm sure i'll do that because i know how it feels. I won't allow my kids to feel this way. I will let them know how their mummy has been treated.